The Most Important Person in the Room, Part One

Ah, there’s nothing like a slow-motion shuttle between East and West to drive home certain truths: Wherever you live, empath or not, you really owe it to yourself to become the most important person in the room.

No crown is necessary. Nor need you adopt the body language of a pushy person. Instead I’m recommending a certain internal positioning, done with your consciousness (that part of you which always is awake inside, a silent witness to all your waking hours).

You matter most. Or you can. Or else you never, ever will.

It’s your choice.

JAPANESE PROBLEMS OR UNIVERSAL ONES?

This morning, I’m about to begin my third day of private sessions with clients here in Tokyo. In the sessions, as well as my first evening presentation, one theme has emerged so far on this tour: All too many good people give undue power to others.

Here in Japan, everyone receives training to bow, to be kind, to seem reasonable, and to not appear overly demanding. Yet many people use the system. They figure out how to pursue their personal aims despite obeying the social requirements. Even the most polite people can become quite adept as bullies (as becomes evident when I cut cords of attachment to various parents and ex-spouses).

Yet other people, empaths especially, take society’s rules to heart. Internalizing the highest ideals of Japanese society, they torture themselves, much as many Western Catholics and Protestants practically kill themselves inside, trying to live according impossible — or distorted — ideals of self-sacrifice. (And, of course, I’ve had some clients who are both Japanese, unskilled empaths, and Christian, thereby giving themselves a kind of marathon challenge in everyday life.)

When trained to put others first, and born with a smaller ego than most, empaths can neglect what else lies in those sensitive hearts… such treasures as the will to survive and the right to have a fulfilling life.

Yes, your heart contains a sequence of your next steps for happiness, one step at a time. Consider your heart to be a kind of soulful global positioning system, a GPS gadget that can keep you from getting lost in life.

In many a personal session, in Japan or back home in America, new clients ask me what they “should” do next. But by the end of that very first session, the client has usually made a big, though subtle, shift. He/she has started to honor his/her own inner self.

From what I’ve observed, doing so many of these sessions over the past two decades, your inner self wants you to live as though you are always the most important person in the room.

WHY CORDS OF ATTACHMENT CAN DISTORT YOUR PRIORITIES

What if, despite all your best intentions, you just can’t get out from under another person’s thumb? Consider the possibility that a cord of attachment is sabotaging your efforts. Each cord records a unique energy flow between yourself and the other person (whom I call “the cordee”). Repeating its toxic programming within your subconscious mind 24/7, you’ll have that kind of brainwashing until the rest of your life… unless you cut that cord.

Which, of course, you can! I wrote CUT CORDS OF ATTACHMENT to give you two great choices.

• Either you can use the book as a how-to, learning a set of professional-level skills, learning quite easily, learning step by step.
• Or you can read the book just to become a wiser consumer, learning more about what is really involved in cutting a cord properly. Stories in the book can educate you as much as the leading-edge concepts. Then you can go forth and find a practitioner who meets your standards.

Cutting cords can — and I would suggest should – tell you a great deal about the client’s underlying relationship to the cordee. Yet many healers today don’t include this information as part of the healing process. At an expo recently, I asked ”Tess,” a professional energy worker, about the kind of information that she received during the process of cutting cords for clients. Tess gave me a stunningly blank look. What information? To her, removing cords is a simple matter of cutting. 

So let the buyer beware. Before working with any healer, ask if there will be specific insights directly from the cord, plus appropriate homework to benefit your subconscious mind. Otherwise only a mechanical procedure will be done. Results will be lacking and, probably, the cord won’t be cut permanently at all.

By contrast, you can find spiritual and emotional healing with Energy Spirituality. Here’s an excerpt of cord dialogue from a session where my Japanese client, “Vivien,” was cutting the cord to her mother:

MOM: Huge self-pity.

VIVIEN: What the heck am I supposed to do about that?

VIVIEN: Stop blaming me for all your problems.

MOM: You don’t have the right to an opinion.

MOM: As a good daughter, you are supposed to listen sympathetically and absorb all my negativity.

MOM: Impatient with you and your talking about yourself.

MOM: You don’t have the right to whine. It’s egoistical.

If you didn’t get the joke, read this sequence again. Back home, I have a whole file of humor from cords. Okay, it’s a specialized form of humor, but one way or another Deeper Perception brings laughter like nothing else. Incidentally, my client Vivien laughed her head off when I read out these items. As requested, she had told me nothing about the nature of the relationship prior to my cutting the cord of attachment.

Blog-Buddies, what has your experience been about learning to put yourself first in life? We’ll be adding to this thread in our next post.