For Empath Empowerment, Quiz Yourself
May 18th, 2009 by Rose Rosetree
Could I be an empath? That’s a first step in Empath Empowerment. Here’s a quiz I developed to help you, adapting a quiz for Highly Sensitive Persons developed by Dr. Elaine Aron.
Are you already a Skilled Empath? Then this quiz may serve to remind you of how far you’ve come.
Empath Empowerment isn’t something you can learn from any blog post or two. Could you learn to ride a bicycle that way? See LINKS for resources that can really make a difference, helping you to stop picking up other people’s pain and fear. Plus there are those wonderful extra benefits to Empath Empowerment. 
(Again, see LINKS.)
Still, the first step toward Empath Empowerment DOES involve figuring out if you’re an empath or not.
You can take Dr. Aron’s quiz for HSPs and, if you’re an empath, you’ll qualify. But being an HSP is very different from being an empath.
Dr. Aron estimates that about 1 in 5 Americans is a Highly Sensitive Person.
By contrast, 1 in 20 Americans has been born as an empath. The big difference is this:
- Being an HSP is about having a very refined nervous system.
- Being an empath is about being able to directly experience what it is like to be other people. That means vivid, intense, personal experience. But it need not be emotional, as you’ll appreciate by taking this quiz.
Add your reactions to this new quiz by writing a comment after you’ve taken the Empath Quiz!
For Empath Empowerment, Start with this Quiz
Answer YES or NO to each of the following questions.
1. I am easily overwhelmed by the suffering of other people.
2. I seem to be aware of subtleties in the feelings of other people.
3. I suffer when someone I am close to has one of the following: an emotional, physical, intellectual, or spiritual problem. (Any one cause of suffering would count; you don’t have to relate to all of them to answer YES.)
4. I assume that most people instinctively react to the problems of others as intensely as I do, only many people I know have better control over this than I do.
5. I find myself needing to withdraw after having had intense contact with other people so that I can restore my sense of self as separate.
6. Even after I withdraw from contact with other people, sometimes I cannot easily shake the memories or feelings from our being together.
7. I am easily overwhelmed by conflict between people, even when I am not personally involved.
8. I have a rich, complex inner life and assume that just about everyone else has the same.
9. I am made uncomfortable by mixed messages from others, e.g., When someone describes himself in one way yet I have a strong sense that something quite different is going on within him.
10. Sometimes I am deeply moved by the experiences of other people, even if I don’t know them personally.
11. Sometimes I feel so overloaded by the experiences of other people, I just would like to turn it all off!
12. Sometimes my own opinions, feelings, or needs seem to be drowned out by the intensity of what I find in others.
13. Sometimes I “medicate” myself with overeating, coffee, etc. so that I don’t feel pulled in so many directions by other people.
14. I can get rattled when I feel that another person dislikes me, even if nothing about this is said on the surface of a conversation.
15. I find that people often expect me to give to them, rather than their giving to me, and I don’t know why this happens so much.
16. Complete strangers choose ME to talk to. Sometimes I wonder if I have a sign in my aura that says, “Tell me your problems.”
17. I try hard to avoid putting other people ahead of myself, but my first impulse tends to be to fulfill what THEY need rather than what I need.
18. When I am driving, stopped at an intersection, and another car honks impatiently, it can be hard for me to wait until moving forward feels safe to me. There is such a pull from inside to do what the other driver wants.
19. I have always been extremely perceptive about other people, about either their emotions, their ideas, their preferences, their values, and/or how they physically feel.
20. Looking in the mirror, the person I see there does not seem to exactly be me. It is as if there is more to me than that simple reflection.
21. Do I feel that the main thing I am is my physical body? No way!
22. Secretly, I have wondered sometimes if I am crazy. Also score a YES if you worry: Could I be too sensitive? Or have weak boundaries? Or just too many ups and downs?
23. I can tell, moment by moment, when people I am close to react to an experience, such as a concert, TV show, etc.
24. I find it unpleasant to be with people who are very upset, physically or emotionally.
25. I often put other people first, not doing it on purpose but as a kind of instinct.
26. I can become unpleasantly aroused when someone around me has a lot of conflict or pain or fear going on. Even after saying goodbye, I can feel bad for quite a while.
27. When I try not to care about others, I feel guilty.
28. It has taken me a long time, growing up, to get a sense of myself as a person, knowing who I really am.
ANSWERS
If you have at least three YES answers, it’s likely that you were born as an empath. That simple!
Empath Empowerment skills are simple, too. They just take a bit of attention and intention to learn. Once you own them, you have them for life.
“JEFF” writes:
I purchased your book Empowered by Empathy and I absolutely love it. Thanks so much for writing it.
I particularly enjoy your lifestyle advice on staying grounded and your techniques of Breaking out of the Amusement Park and Coming Home.
Anyways, from reading your book I realize that I do struggle with out of control empathy: emotional intuition and emotional oneness but your book has helped a lot with that.
I also struggle with ADHD. I take Adderall for the ADHD and it kills my empathy. I don’t feel malled and I don’t connect when I don’t want to, in fact I find it hard to connect even when I do want to.
I’m just sharing because I thought you might find it interesting, the possiblity of a connection between ADHD and Empathy. Well have a great day!
JEFF, first I want to comment on medicating yourself with Adderall. It may work, but at an awfully high cost to your nervous system — and not just in the ways you have mentioned, which are quite serious.
I would recommend that you consider some sessions of Energy Release Regression Therapy, to help you move out STUFF that has been deposited in your system by the Adderall. In such sessions, I have helped clients to remove STUFF related to illegal substances.
For a first session with me, I would recommend a phoner where I facilitate cutting a cord of attachment, starting to clean up STUFF from your aura in that way.
There are really two ways to go, either junking and numbing up your aura — the Adderall route — or the cleaning and healing an aura route. When you want to choose the latter, I’d love to help you.
The techniques in “Empowered by Empathy” can’t work their best when the system is distorted by STUFF caused by Adderall or other optional chemicals. For more about ADHD, see the next comment.
JEFF, about the connection between being an empath and having ADHD:
For clarity, you are referring to an Attention Deficit Disorder, correct?
There is no particular connection between them, in my experience. Being an empath does not set you up for any disease or psychiatric diagnosis or need for medication.
STUFF can be involved, however. Taking in STUFF as an unskilled empath will exacerbate all a person’s problems, including that one.
In the previous comment, I recommended Energy Release Regression Therapy as a means to help with the Adderall problem. I would also recommend it as a means to remove causes of ADHD. Although I don’t make claims that we can remove that syndrome completely, I have had success with helping clients who had been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, panic attacks.
From my perspective, it makes sense that when frozen blocks of energy in a person’s cells are stuck, that distorts the person’s ability to pay attention.
You can make it your business, JEFF, to seek out professional healing that removes frozen blocks of energy. Find a healer who is compatible with you (I would be honored to be your choice) and don’t stop healing, bit by bit, until you can claim a GREAT life, with excellent, natural ability to pay attention however you wish.
Finally, JEFF and other Blog-Buddies, you can find some practical articles about Regression Therapy here:
http://www.rose-rosetree.com/faq.htm#aboutregressions
Plus consumer info here: http://www.rose-rosetree.com/RegressionTherapy.htm#consumer
And a whole bunch of articles about how Energy Release Regression Therapy can help with specific problems here:
http://www.rose-rosetree.com/RegressionTherapy.htm#benefits
HI Rose,
This quiz is helpful in getting more objectivity on being an empath and realizing that others aren’t?! I have assumed that other people have a lot of these same abilities as myself, but just “managed” them better or were “healthier”. Yikes. Talk about dumping on my self-esteem.
I am so happy to be on my way to becoming skilled. At times, it is still hard for me to imagine what other people experience, if they aren’t experiencing things of this “deeper perception” level..??! Perhaps this will become clearer to me and make more sense as I become more skilled, and learn to separate myself more clearly from others.
I imagine this is also a path to get to know “me” more, freer of “stuff”. I hope so. But what I hope most, is to stop taking on additional “stuff” and emotional baggage from other people as if it is my own. It’s not!! How empowering! And the relief this will provide is palpable. Thanks for writing Empath Empowerement. : )
From JEFF: Thanks for the quick reply and wow!
The adderall is my prescription and I’ve only practiced your techniques while not on the medication.
You are right about frozen blocks and while I’ve never heard that word before I know exactly what you mean. I refer to them as cocoons.
I think you connected with me by reading my email and could tell about the frozen blocks. I think these blocks compound my problem of uncontrolled empathy because when I can pick up on the negative emotions of others I can pick up on other people’s feelings of insecurity, hostility, jealousy and selfishness so powerfully that I can taste them.
My question though is if my problem really is frozen blocks then why can I study and pay attention extremely well in an empty house, one on one situations, or in the dorm when everyone is sleeping?
I would think that since I carry these blocks around all the time that my attention should be also pretty steady.
You see my attention problems are affected by being around people. If there are no people around then I can study. I can be extremely focused such that I can remember the details of peoples dress, my surroundings, conversations, or assigned readings down to the slightest nuance.
I feel like if there is no one around for me to absorb STUFF from or if I’m so connected with someone that it reduces the amount of STUFF that I absorb from everyone else that I have no problems at all. Is that possible?
This list made me laugh a little bit. I just went through saying “Yes, yes, yes, yes…” But, thankfully, I can see a lot of them fading into past tense.
The only one I think I can say no to is wondering if I’m crazy. Doing drugs has made me feel that way, but I don’t think my empathy has.
Jeff - Your frozen block could hold information saying, “I can’t pay attention when other people are around because (blah blah blah..)”. The blocks are very nuanced and specific to you and you’ve “learned” from past experiences. It’s not as if there is a specific ADHD block installed in each afflicted person, or that there is just a generalized “lack of focus” block that is in effect no matter where you are or who’s around you.
For example, you have a block (or multiple blocks), put in place by a past experience, telling you that people are always more important to pay attention to than your work. So, when people are around, that’s where your focus inevitably goes. And it feels nearly impossible to work around! I just released something very similar in a regression session.
Lisa - I have the same thoughts, wondering what life feels like for people who aren’t empaths. I imagine they just go bumping around life nearly unaware of other people. You know, on the extreme side of the scale, lol. I don’t know, I’m just glad I’m an empath. Seems like life would be pretty dull any other way!
Loved the quiz. The ones that really stood out for me were #5&6 (I have to decompress after being with people and distract myself so as not mull over and analyze every moment) and #9 (I find mixed messages really bothersome to the point where I’m tempted to say “You don’t think that at all! Why do you gain by pretending you do?”).
I have a copy of Empowered by Empathy and I think I need to go back and re-read about how to turn empathy off.
Excellent, SUE. Empath Empowerment is one of those life skills that deepens ever time you return to it.
Weird. I don’t think I’m an empath, really, but I answered yes to most of these. Many of them do seem to me like things that most people would experience or feel … but maybe not? I suppose that is part of the point. At any rate, thanks for posting this, Rose.
A.D., sounds like you have just made an important discovery. MOST unskilled empaths don’t know they’re empaths. They expect, just as you used to, that “everyone is just like me.”
In “Empowered by Empathy,” there’s a whole chapter called “Skeptical Interlude” where you can test yourself further about whether or not you’re really an empath.
Plus elsewhere in the book you have detailed descriptions of the different gifts an empath might have. So you really can connect with Aha! experiences around what it means to be born as an empath.
Browse the print edition or audio edition of “Empowered by Empathy” by clicking on the cover at http://www.rose-rosetree.com. Or just give yourself a holiday weekend gift by calling our toll-free order number (Works in the U.S. and Canada 24/7.) That’s 800-345-6665.
Once you KNOW you’re an empath, that’s good. But it doesn’t make someone skilled as an empath. That’s what the book is for.
Learning this skill set isn’t hard, but it takes some time and attention. You could compare it to learning how to ride a bike.
Becoming a Skilled Empath involves your entire mind-body-spirit system. That’s why I can’t just post “The Secret” on my blog and instantly all unskilled empaths have all problems solved.
But you have taken a vital first step here, A.D. If you think your life has been great so far, just wait until you’re a Skilled Empath. Wow!
And, meanwhile, thanks for writing.
I especially like #9. I am frequently amazed at how many people seem to engage in wishful thinking when describing themselves. Various types of personal profiles on the Internet, which frequently include a person’s picture (thus enabling you to read their aura), are especially good places to see this in action.
I chuckled when you said if you answered at least 3 questions “yes” you were probably a born empath; how about 28 yeses?
I love #18. I hate it when I’m trying to make a left turn and someone comes up behind me. They don’t even have to honk for me to feel pressured. When I’m first in line at the light, I have to pay close attention to the light so that I can go right away and not hold anyone up.
Like #9, I hate it when people deny the way I sense that they’re feeling. Also, when they say they were “just joking” about something. It blows me away that people can not know what they’re feeling.
I remember wishing as a child that I could read other people’s minds so that I could know the right thing to make them happy. Even I knew that was pretty weird. So many experiences in my life make sense now as I look back on them.
I’m 57 yrs old and I’m finding that I’m getting more sensitive as time goes on. In the past few years it has started extending to plants, animals (especially trees and cats) and even sometimes inanimate objects.
So many people have called me their “therapist” and joked that they ought to be paying me for our “sessions”. I’ve received gifts from strangers for helping them when I used to work in a store and also from some people I’ve worked with (and helped) in other places.
I always wondered if I was so good with people, why did I want to avoid social situations like parties or even family reunions? I’m much better “one on one” with people.
It is only recently that I’ve started recognizing/believing I’m an empath. I always thought I was just a “nice” person. Thanks for the quiz, it is another step in learning who I really am.
Sorry for the multiple comments, I didn’t realize until this last one that you could write more than just a couple of paragraphs per comment. There I go again, apologizing and explaining so I won’t make anyone upset. It just feels too bad not to.
CHERYL, each of your comments is just great. It works well with a blog to have a separate comment for each topic. I do the same myself. Makes things more readable for all the Blog-Buddies.
If you have a chance to read “Empowered by Empathy,” I have a hunch it will help you a lot.
As I was explaining to some Japanese clients today (through an interpreter), learning to become a Skilled Empath is a lot like learning to ride a bicycle. Doesn’t take forever, but it is a very specialized knack that takes a bit of practice.
Learning about yourself (28!!!!) from this Quiz is a great first step, but only the very beginning. The practical point is that when a Skilled Empath you won’t be picking up STUFF into your aura, STUFF you may not even consciously be aware of carrying. Consciously recognized or not, it still can come back to bite you, as it were.
Also, for the sake of being of service to others, you’ll really enjoy the third part of Empath Empowerment, not learning about your gifts, or learning how to effortlessly and naturally keep them turned OFF most of the time, but learning pwerful techniques to safely turn your gifts ON, fully!
It’s a delight to have met you today. Keep on reading and commenting as you become part of this informal — and SWEET — online community.
Rose,
Thank you for your suggestions. I would love to read your book. I’m going to get it as soon as I can get the money together.
Maybe I’m strange, but I love being able to feel people’s emotions (now that I know that’s what’s happening). I want to enhance my sensitivity as much as I can. After reading your site, I am trying to be more aware of my reactions when I’m with people. I purposely try to send out loving energy to people when I’m with them and I find I feel it coming back to me in almost all cases. Sometimes the energy goes back and forth and is intensified with each exchange in the encounter. I am so grateful for this gift and for finally being able to use it in a more conscious way.
That being said, I admit that it IS very difficult to deal with angry people (that’s the hardest emotion for me to handle). Fortunately, now that I know where it is coming from, I can step back from the anger a little more easily. The thing that still upsets me severely is when I am trying to deal with two people with conflicting needs at one time. I can’t be my best with either of them then and it causes me much anxiety and pain.
Concerning the quiz, not all 28 questions were equally true for me, but I did identify to varying degrees with all of them. Hope this clarifies things.
“20. Looking in the mirror, the person I see there does not seem to exactly be me. It is as if there is more to me than that simple reflection.”
Does anybody else look in the mirror and see what looks like totally different people on different days? It shocks me sometimes that I can look so different. Sometimes other people seem to change too.
CHERYL, that mirror thing is very common for empaths. Wrote about it a bit in Empowered by Empathy.
It’s delightful having you become part of our Blog Community. Thanks for both your recent coments.
Hi Rose,
I bought and started reading “Empowered by Empathy” and “Aura Reading”. I have to tell you, you are the REAL DEAL. The extent of your expertise and teaching ability just jumps off the pages. Thank you for sharing all your hard-won experience with us. You’ve spared a lot of people a lot of suffering.
There was one thing, though, that was very uncomfortable for me. It was the tone of belligerance in many of the Q&A questions (am I the only one that hears this?) I kept thinking, “why can’t you ask the question in a pleasant way instead of jumping down Rose’s throat when she’s only trying to help you?” In your seminars, do people really act that way? If so, it seems ironic that they are attending an empathy seminar. I admire the patient and thorough answers you gave them in spite of it all. It was very calming.
I hope that reacting so strongly to this was just me being sensitive and that you weren’t as hurt by it in real life as I was by only reading it.
CHERYL, you sweetie. How your question made me laugh. Am I correct in guessing that you do not live in the United States?
In my 39 years, so far, as a spiritual teacher, I have had some of the most exquisite students you can imagine. Others have been merely delightful. Moving down the continuum of bliss, however, I have encountered students at least as rude as those you’ll encounter in my Q&As.
On this blog, for instance, you haven’t seen many comments that were simply not enabled.
The useful thing about printably rude questions is that they can bluntly address concerns people really do care about. By making the questions so blunt, I’m not merely paraphrasing questions from my students. I’m letting the pain/fear/skepticism show.
However, I’m glad to announce that in my more recent books — LET TODAY BE A HOLIDAY, CUT CORDS OF ATTACHMENT, READ PEOPLE DEEPER — there aren’t any more Q&A sections.
Foreign publishers have convinced me that they don’t like to include such things in their books. For instance, I think of my respected publishing buddy Nina Normann Ferguson, whom I would dearly love to have publish my books some day.
So you may not be the only one to be turned off to the blunt, smart alecky, tone of the Q&A sections in AURA READING THROUGH ALL YOUR SENSES, THE POWER OF FACE READING, and EMPOWERED BY EMPATHY.
Just remember this: America is so wacky that, in my state of Virginia, we have passed a concealed weapons law that makes it okay for people to carry hidden guns when the go to a bar! And recently legislation was passed nationally to allow people to tote their firearms into national parks.
Hi Rose,
I didn’t mean for it to sound like I didn’t like the Q & A section. In fact, I found them very helpful. I just felt pain on your behalf when I read them. I guess that I should have realized that a lot of people feel skeptical. Fear does cause people to be angry. If they only knew the love and wonder they are missing.
Aw, CHERYL, I could tell you liked the Q&As. And your being appalled at how rude people can be when asking questions. You Sweetie!
Well, some students are skeptical and rude, but they still are sincerely interested. I’m happy to teach such people. Of course, I prefer if they are skeptical and polite.
Some students are skeptical and rude… and just showing off. I’ve learned to spot that very easily.
For that matter, some students are polite and may have a question or two, but they don’t really want to learn anything from me at all. With CORDS OF ATTACHMENT, for instance, they like to test me. Will I match their set ideas? As in, “Can you cut all my cords in one session?”
If I give the “right” answer, the one they expect, then I pass the first test. Etc.
The whole process is a delight, and it’s lovely how fast people decide if they really want to study with me or not. So I don’t have to let any of it cause me pain.
But I do accept your good wishes, for sure!!!!!!!
Rose,
The other day I used one of your links to get to a blog entry where you have aura photos of yourself while doing an empathic merge with crystals. Try as I might, I can’t seem to find it again. I tried using the search function, but that didn’t help. I am interested in learning more about crystal/mineral empathy. Can you direct me to that blog entry?
Also I have a question. What does one use crystal empathy for? In other types of empathy you are helping people, plants or animals.
Thanks.
HI Rose,
I love your attitude:
“The whole process is a delight, and it’s lovely how fast people decide if they really want to study with me or not. So I don’t have to let any of it cause me pain”.
And keeping this attitude in the whole kit and kaboodle of prospective clients/students being rude to you and testing you… That is an impressive attitude to hold onto.
I aspire and am focusing on holding onto a positive and empowered feeling/attitude when I get thrown off my center by interactions with rude or toxic people. Most notably for me right now, with my in-laws and their radically disfunctional and toxic ways. Would be great to always stay centered and empowered. Ahhhhh… thanks for the inspiration that it is possible.
Aw, if you had any in-laws like YOU, ANONYMOUS, that would go a long way toward restoring your joy.