When a Divorce Turns into Decades

I’m not entirely convinced that divorce should be legal. Not unless each party to the proceeding has the option to Cut the Cord of Attachment to that ex.

Otherwise, it only seems like a divorce. Energetically the couple stays connected through life.

Haven’t we all met someone who wasn’t able to move on? Years later, even decades later, Gladys and Henry may be divorced. But they still aren’t dating. If you were to ask, this is what you would not hear:

 ”I’m still processing the most hurtful or frightening bits of that old marriage. It runs through me 24/7 and will continue until the last day of my life, spilling over into my subconscious mind as well as my aura.”

No, that would be acknowledging the Cord of Attachment, which neither Henry nor Gladys probably knows about, not in the least.

Instead, this is what you might hear if you were bold enough to ask, “Have you ever considered marrying again?”

• Long-term relationships are overrated. They’re not worth the trouble.
• I’m not marriage material.
• All the good ones are taken.
• Been there, done that. Long-term relationships don’t interest me any more. 

Could be, Henry and Gladys aren’t using free will nearly as much as they suppose. Instead, an underlying experience is framing the anti-marriage (or equivalent) sentiments. You guessed it, there’s a problem related to an old Cord of Attachment.

Self-disclosure interlude

Before continuing with this topic, I’d like to share where I’m coming from. Everyone has deep values on the topic of love relationships and, especially, marriage. I definitely do not believe that adults can only be happy if they arrange themselves two-by-two, as if auditioning for a latter day version of Noah’s Ark.

Moving back through time, not all the way to biblical times but to, say, 1973, I was more than divorced. I was crushing. On God.

During my Transcendental Meditation (TM) years (1969-1986), I became very interested in becoming a recluse like my guru Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. During my first course with Maharishi, I asked him, “Who becomes enlightened first, householders (married people) or recluses (monks and nuns, like him)?”

Maharishi said, “Recluses gain enlightenment (Cosmic Consciousness) first. But, once enlightened, householders move more quickly into a glorified state of enlightenment (God Consciousness).”

Fine answer from him but bad timing for me! I was asking this question during my honeymoon to Ari Davis, Husband #1. Yes, back in the day, our idea of a romantic getaway was to go to TM Teacher Training in Poland Springs, Maine.

Not surprisingly, given my bigger crush, that answer from my guru was the kiss of death for matrimony and me, for as long as I stayed in TM. Ari and I divorced a couple of years later. (Incidentally, I wouldn’t discover until 1986 that Maharishi was lying about how TM was for householders, rather than recluses. Another story….)

Anyway, by 1973 I was on another course with Maharishi. And, this time, I implored him to start a kind of monastic order within TM. With one of my friends, Eric Dahl, I went to Big M to implore him. In response, Maharishi started something called “The M Group.” (This was his cute play on words, since M could stand for Monk or for Mini-Maharishi, etc.)

Fairly soon after that, Maharishi announced two program for recluses, “Mother Divine” for women and “Purusha” for men. Applying right away, I was so thrilled to see the number stamped on my official application: 000000001.

Less gratifying was the response. There was none.

After I sent in that application, no response came. Ever. Now my friend Cynthia Lane, she was accepted. My very close friend Art Boucher, he was accepted. (Cynthia is now “at large” in society, a spiritual teacher in her own right, and dazzlingly enlightened. Artie lives in the Himalayas, still on Purusha. He’s the loving godfather of my son Matt.)

But I wasn’t accepted into the convent version of TM. Nor was I rejected, exactly. So for years I kept hoping that my acceptance letter would come in the mail. Meanwhile, I continued my celibacy program for seven years. 

Given that extremely earnest attempt at a “lifestyle,” I had plenty of contact with people who constantly said, “How come you’re not married?”

I wasn’t impressed with all the people who were so very, very sure that I needed marriage. To this day, I still never tell people “You should be married.”

Although I sure am now, and have been for 19 years. Right now, Mitch and I now exploring a fascinating second honeymoon phase, with Matt off at college. Sweet!

Okay, back now at the topic of divorce, pain, and Cords of Attachment.

Cords of Attachment and YOUR Love Life

Some marriages are really, really awful. Some are merely divorceable, so you might think later, “I was only young then.” or “That was a starter marriage. Didn’t count.”

Of course I can’t comment here about the state of any relationship, including the impact on your aura from all those married (and/or not-married) ex-es.

But I will tell you this, based on my experience cutting Cords of Attachment with clients since 1986. Unless you live in a really large harem, it’s a big deal to get a divorce — whether your conscious mind knows it or not. The best way to find out is to have it removed. Then you learn what was in it.

And you learn this info. at the right time — when that particular Cord of Attachment no longer is imprinting your aura and subconscious mind 24/7.

What clients remember when Cords of Attachment are cut

If you could join me on the phone, during sessions of Energy Spirituality, you might be amazed to hear clients react after I read them the contents of a cut cord.

Usually some time-specific information given during that part of 12 Steps to Cut Cords of Attachment. I’ll say something like:

• These Cord Items got imprinted right after the honeymoon.
• These Cord Items come from the day you decided to get the divorce.
• This sequence of Cord Dialogue related to the first time your spouse got really drunk in front of you.

Thus, sometimes the client receives validation about an event, and emotions, that took place some 10, 20, or 30 years before.

What gets stuck in a Cord of Attachment is what seems worst to YOU, not necessarily what the other person, or anyone else, might think.

One client, Gladys, has a very high level of consciousness. With her refined perception, guess what got stuck in her Cord of Attachment to “Sam,” her husband?

During an argument, she got so angry that she wanted to hit him. In her light body, she gave him a slap.

Yes, Gladys was awake enough inside to know she was doing this. It happened impulsively. Yet Gladys felt so bad about this. For more than 20 years, she felt guilty.

Talk about being a deeply nonviolent person!

And talk about feeling better after that Cord of Attachment was cut!

Cutting a Cord of Attachment when you wish to stay married

That’s smart, too. As you know if you’ve been reading much about Cutting Cords of Attachment, these astral-level types of debris are completely separate from the etheric-level spiritual ties that we also form to significant others.

When you cut a Cord of Attachment to a S.O., that doesn’t force you to break up. Or stay together. You just stop dragging the most painful past around with you, like a rag of a lovey.

Recently, I cut a Cord of Attachment for a client who wished to stay married. And she had been married for 25 years. “Harriet” laughed at almost every single cord item.

The cord items had been laid down very early in the marriage. Harriet hadn’t thought consciously about those feelings and relationship dynamics. But hearing me read them out, after the cord had been cut, was tremendously healing for her.

“Do I have to remember anything for you to successfully cut a cord?”

Last week I had the cutest client, “Doug.” During our session, it became clear that he thought that he had to be able to remember important events of a relationship in order for me to facilitate cutting his Cord of Attachment.

No worries! Here’s how hard you have to work, and how much you must know. If I’m going to facilitate cutting a Cord of Attachment for you:

• You must be willing to have the session, schedule it, pay the fee for my time.
• You must stay on the phone, or be in my office, for the whole time (minus any bathroom breaks).
• If it’s an in-person session, you can’t sit there and Tweet all your friends.
• No coming to your session drunk or stoned!
• When I give a simple instruction, such as asking you to repeat a permission statement, you must follow it.

Hey, that’s it. As you know well, if you ever have been in session with me for Aura Healing and Transformation (a.k.a. Energy Spirituality), I get most of the information needed directly from your aura. If there is a need for you to tell me the things you already know consciously, I’ll ask. And I probably won’t ask much….

What if you want to cut your own Cord of Attachment?

Excellent! Learn how from my book (see LINKS below) or from the Intensive Workshop that I’ll be hosting next weekend, October 16-18. This is my annual Cut the Cords workshop, where you develop skills or refine the skills you already have. (And, no, we don’t spend the entire weekend cutting your major cords of attachment. You might release one or two MINOR cords as you practice. The purpose is gaining skill.)

To sign up for the Cut the Cords workshop, or ask questions, email Julie Schroedl at Julie Schroedl[at]msn.com or call 1-540-310-4896

When cutting Cords of Attachment, there’s no “memory requirement” for you as a practitioner.

Receiving the unique information in a Cord of Attachment is precious for healing. But that is never done by “figuring out what it should be” or struggling to consciously remember a particular trauma.

Instead, you use a technique of Aura Reading to get the information. I teach some really, really easy but effective ones for this purpose.

And the overall purpose of that how-to book, Cut Cords of Attachment, is to give you all the skills you need, no previous experience necessary.

Whether you’re married or single, have one ex or a whole string of them, get yourself healed. Every Cord of Attachment that limits your current love life is one cord too many.