The idea hadn’t occurred to me until I learned about some startling research in my trusty Washington Post. On September 5, 2010, Ellen McCarthy reported on a study that appeared in the Journal of Neurophysiology. It didn’t have to do with cutting cords of attachment, but keep reading and I’m sure you’ll be able to connect some mighty interesting dots.
The research team was headed by psychologist Art Aron (the husband of another psychologist, Elaine Aron, who has written about Highly Sensitive Persons and pioneered this field). Aron, anthropologist Helen Fisher, and others studied romantic rejection.
If you have been through that icky terrain, be sure to keep reading. If you have friends who are stuck there now, in the pain swamp, please send them a link to the post. Okay, back to the research….
All subjects recounted heart-wrenching tales of woe, such as one who told an interviewer, “I can’t sleep. I just lie there, wondering what happened and what could have been.”
What Aron and his four fellow researchers did was to study activity in their brains. Their finding?
The romantically rejected don’t just have obsessive thinking and craving for emotional union. They think about the person who rejected them 85% of their waking hours. Also they may cry a lot, beg to be taken back, call and email a lot, and drink too much. Neurologically, this pattern is similar to what cocaine addicts suffer during withdrawal. CONTINUE READING