On a previous thread, Ryan raised a very interesting question:
Mainstream thinking claims that certain types of people such as narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths cannot be cured.
I am curious what you think about such people who are typically considered beyond help and how much you have worked with such people and what kind of results were obtained.
Many personality disorders can’t be healed because people think they’re fine the way they are and, therefore, don’t seek help. When things in life go wrong, they’re quick to blame and to judge. Changing doesn’t seem desirable because other people seem to be “the problem.”
Recognizing this isn’t just mainstream thinking, Ryan. Trained psychotherapists will tell you the same thing. But here’s where your question becomes really interesting to me. There are still many important healing opportunities around narcissists etc. and, yes, I have had experience with successfully helping some of them.
SPOTTING NARCISSISTS, SOCIOPATHS, AND PSYCHOPATHS
The easiest way to spot a personality disorder, by far, is to read the person’s aura.
Empaths, caution! Of course, you know not to turn your gifts ON unless you have first read the person’s aura, right? Because it would be foolish to purposely do an unskilled empath merge with someone who has major emotional or spiritual problems. You would open yourself up to taking on that person’s fear, pain, worries, rage, etc. (This aspect of self-protection alone is reason enough to read Empath Empowerment in 30 Days and learn to turn your gifts OFF most of the time. As you may know, unskilled empaths do Unskilled Empath merges with anyone within spitting distance, picking up problems as a matter of course and holding the STUFF in their own auras.)
Each person’s aura is distinctive, so the range of experiences with personality disorders that you can find as an aura reader puts the DSM classifications (used by mental health professionals) to shame. There are so many variations on what can go wrong within a person in terms of STUFF.
While labels like “narcissist” serve a purpose, they don’t do justice to an evolving soul, so I prefer to think of people as having very individual configurations of STUFF. When people come to me for personal sessions of Rosetree Energy Spirituality, they don’t ask me to diagnose their pathology. They just ask for help, and I give it as best I can.
Thus, I have helped some people who might be considered narcissists by cutting cords of attachment. Parents, lovers, etc. can add to anyone’s troubles. Narcissists may particularly relish hearing about cord items where the cordee was at fault, but I read out ALL the cord items, including ones from my client. One session at a time, I do what I can to help the client to grow.
Someone with a personality disorder may show a very limited interest in sessions because they mostly want confirmation that they are fine, others are to blame, etc. I think of one face reading session I did for “Johnny,” a young and handsome TV star whose intention couldn’t have been clearer. Even though he never said it outright, here’s what he wanted: “Tell me how perfect I am. Then tell my future and predict that I will have everything that I want.”
Ignoring this tacit invitation, I just did the typical nuanced Life Potential Face Reading, with each face trait related to a talent and also a life lesson, with spiritual mission discussed at the end, and facial attributes related to it.
Johnny was pretty disgusted.
THE “NARCISSISTS” WHO AREN’T
Anita made a number of fascinating points in her latest two comments at this blog. It is all too easy to call someone else a “Narcissist” because that person has failed to please us. RES Energy READING can make the difference between assuming that someone is deeply troubled vs. identifying real STUFF.
Calling people narcissists or blaming them for your troubles is not the approach of an empowered person. Truth is, nobody in your life now has the power to hold back your happiness, health, or wellbeing, nobody but you.
Today it is trendy to blame people for being narcissists, or to fear “psychic attack” or “energy vampires.” But if you’re really aiming at a fulfilling and self-actualized life, do you really want to waste your time with excuses like these?
- Better to avoid those unproductive relationships, cut your cords of attachment to them, and move on. As described in depth in Let Today Be a Holiday, you can create “Family of Choice” to replace “Family of Blood.” Connect with the people who please you; free will can take you there.
- And better to read people deeper and spot the sociopaths than to keep engaging with them, expecting that, somehow, you’re going to save them. That’s what Deeper Perception is for, folks! In Read People Deeper, you have the tools to spot liars, alcoholics, etc. so that you can make better choices about which relationships are worth a big investment of your time, feelings, etc.
Beyond finding pathologies in others, it’s very revealing when a person spends a lot of time worrying about narcissists, psychopaths, and such. Maybe that complainer, like Ryan, has dealt with the past and move forward. But, alternatively, could that complainer be very self-involved, deeply enmeshed in the process of recovery, or taking a personal trip that involves exploring the wonderful and fascinating world of victimhood?
You may know some people who are spending years that way, having few friends outside the realm of fellow sufferers, holding a very subjective view of life and not terribly effective in the objective world, not yet.
It’s a stage, that’s all. And there’s no harm in it, long-term. But the irony is that such a person might well seem to others to be…. a narcissist. I have helped many clients in this category, and they’ve done well.
RELEASING NARCISSISM FOR GOOD
Working with clients, I have found that there are many approaches to releasing STUFF that might seem like narcissism to others. Recently I facilitated a Spirit Removal for a client who might have appeared to be highly self-involved; he just knew he was suffering terribly, and by the end of the session, he had really come up from under a cloud. Cutting cords of attachment, healing astral debris — using skill sets that I teach in many different intensives, you can make a difference for people considered to have personality disorders. I have had the privilege of doing this often.
But if I were going to name one technique that I use most frequently to release deep character problems, it would be Soul Energy Awakening Hypnosis®. This is a method that enables you to remove frozen blocks of energy from the level of cells. I learned these techniques from Dr. Coletta Long. (At my website, you’ll find many articles that go into detail about this distinctive method of hypnosis and regression.)
True, I have had some clients who never made it past their first regression. Moreover, during their initial interview, it became clear that THEY could be considered people with personality disorders. And their relish in talking about themselves was not matched by their interest in healing. Still they received as much healing as they were ready for.
I think of “Fred,” who didn’t return for a second session (not yet, anyway). Fred was quite severely troubled. During his first regression, he went in deeply and removed many frozen blocks of energy. At one point, Fred cried quite a bit. After the session was over, and we were talking, Fred looked at me indignantly and said, “But I NEVER cry.”
Never would be a very long time. What you’ll find, if you receive this type of healing session, is that probably you have had Perpetrator Lives where you were the narcissist or psychopath or sociopath. Even while triumphing over others, selling them into slavery, murdering them, or taking advantage of them sexually, etc., part of you felt guilty.
All the mixed emotions, together, from such experiences become stuck in frozen blocks of energy. I suspect that for everyone today who has suffered from being hurt by narcissists, there are many frozen blocks in that victim’s deep past, stuck energies that attracted the present problems, stuck energies that can be released one way or another.
So the most practical point to our discussion — to me — is that you’re responsible for your life, for your healing. You are the point person. You have the power to rise above anyone trying to manipulate you, even if that “person” is just a shadow from your own past.