Deeper Perception Made Practical

When an Empath Looks in a Mirror

rose rosetree, empath





Oh, the merriment! Four heads, 19 noses!

Wait, that’s my blog post for another planet.

Here on Earth, I’ve taken surveys when teaching classes to empaths. Let’s include you right now:

Ever since you were a kid, when you have looked in the mirror, have you had a reaction like this?

That’s supposed to be me?

Sure, you recognize “it,” the face, the body. Maybe you even approve of the outfit. But there’s a sense that it isn’t quite you.

Empaths come in different varieties. Your gift(s) could be physical, emotional, spiritual, intellectual, environmental, animal, crystal, plant, mechanical, even molecular. I

If you are new to learning about Empath Empowerment®, avoid the common mistake of assuming that “Empath = emotional” or “Empath means mushy and gushy.”

What does every born empath have in common? You have a gift for directly experiencing what it is like to be someone else. That’s all. But that’s plenty.

As I explain — and even illustrate — in my upcoming book, Become The Most Important Person in The Room: Your 30-Day Plan for Empath Empowerment, [Now by the time of this edit in 2019, updated for the Age of Awakening as Empath Empowerment in 30 Days] born empaths also have auras that behave a bit differently from “normal.” (If you believe that anyone living on earth is, exactly, “normal.” Good luck!)

Born empaths are merely talented, not yet skilled. So they often do spontaneous Unskilled Empath Merges.

They do this in a random fashion. And, unintentionally, they wind up taking other people’s STUFF back into their own, personal auras. Besides that little problem, there’s the mirror thing. Usually an empath doesn’t identify with one human identity as consistently as non-empaths do.

By contrast non-empaths don’t do Unskilled Empath Merges. Or Skilled Empath Merges. Although I wouldn’t bother feeling sorry for them. Everyone in a human body here at Earth School is evolving super fast, one way or another.


You’ll see your physical self, of course.

That’s supposed to be me?

The longer version would go: Sure I recognize that physical self. It’s part of me. But it sure ain’t all of me.

Empaths aren’t the only ones who don’t fully identify with their image in a mirror. For instance, a person could have disassociative problems, developing at any time during life.

Occasionally the problem is that the person would benefit from the healing work commonly known as a Spirit Removal. That’s a rather specialized skill set. So far this year I have facilitated about 25 of those, a very small fraction of all the sessions done but extremely helpful for the people who needed it.

(If you ever worry that you may be one of those people, schedule a session of RES Energy HEALING. If an exorcism is what you need, that’s what you’ll get. Otherwise, you’ll receive other healing, such as cutting a major Cord of Attachment.)

Another cause for feeling distant from one’s image in the mirror involves not identifying with one’s gender at birth. A person could solve this problem by undergoing gender reassignment, as one friend of mine is doing now — and I am so proud of her for honoring her inner self!

Others have seen a strikingly handsome man in “Henry.” But he has seen “she,” which is a pretty good reason to not quite accept that mirror image.


Not identifying with the image a mirror shows you… can represent a problem. But for an empath, it’s part of what makes you special. That mild feeling of “Huh?” is linked to something wonderful.

Hint: It’s one reason why you can be of such great service to others (and do it comfortably) when you become a Skilled Empath.

Empaths come into a lifetime with more spiritual consciousness than the typical human person. It’s because of all that awareness, that’s why your image in the mirror seems lacking. Maybe it doesn’t feel all that sticky to you.

That’s supposed to be me? I’m so much more than that.

Because most people haven’t had even a single conversation yet about being an empath, who knew? That familiar experience in the mirror belongs to such a conversation.

Honestly, have you ever talked about this? Or has the experience been for you as it was, for me: For a long time, something that felt weird or slightly shameful?

It wasn’t until I wrote Empowered by Empathy, more than 10 years ago, that I allowed myself to take that mirror experience out of denial and consider the implications.

How about you, Blog-Buddies, have you ever had such an experience? And, if so, what explanation did you used to give yourself?

This mirror must be broken?

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  1. 1
    Anabela says:

    I recall doing this exercise during one of your mentoring sessions. It is immensely reassuring to know I’m not the only one!

    As a child, I asked my mother how is it possible that the skin around me makes me who I am? She didn’t get my question and responded along the lines that “Your name is this and therefore you’re you.”

    Of course, now I realize that I was really asking how is it that I feel my being is a consciousness far beyond my body, and yet the body limits who I am? I wonder how a 6 year-old child could ever understand the concept or experience of consciousness, but I suppose being an empath explains it. An empath’s experience is so expansive and can go anywhere.

    The empaths’ challenge is generally to stay home, within themselves.

  2. 2

    ANABELA, point 1: Here is a public shout-out about how proud I am of you and how far you have come. (Even though I didn’t know you as that smart six-year-old.)

    Point 2: I think that young kids understand about consciousness, aura reading, even Empath Merge (if they’re empaths) just fine. They may still have some things to learn, which gives us grownups good reason to hang around. 😉

    And Point 3: I couldn’t agree with you more that the empath’s challenge is to stay home, comfortable with self, resourceful and free.

    Thanks so much for sharing.

  3. 3
    Dana says:

    When I was a young girl I used to spend long periods of time looking in the mirror at myself. I would lock myself in the bathroom, dance around, and make faces at myself in the mirror. It never got old and was my own version of the Coming Home technique. My mom would bang on the bathroom door: “What are you DOING in there??”

    Then as a teenager I went through an “I’m too cool for mirrors stage.” I was so “not my body,” who needed a mirror? (This was much to the detriment of my self-awareness and probably general appearance).

    I am happy to report that I now look in mirrors regularly, both for practical purposes and an “I still look like everybody else” check. But I do miss that feeling from childhood of looking in the mirror and going, “Cool!”

  4. 4

    LOL, DANA.

    Incidentally, Blog Buddies, for those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of seeing this Dana person, there’s a technical term for how she looks: Gorgeous.

  5. 5
    Cheryl says:


    I wonder if the experience that I have sometimes is the same as the one you’re describing? It is an experience I’ve always thought was very strange. When I look in the mirror I will see myself but my face can look physically different at times. Not like a whole different person, but enough of a difference that it sometimes shocks me.

    It doesn’t seem the same as your description of seeing yourself in the mirror and realizing that the physical image there doesn’t include the consciousness that you are. To put it another way, as an empath, can the consciousness that you’re merging with (consciously or unconsciously) on a certain day actually change your physical looks? Or perhaps, is it that you’re just projecting another aspect of your current personality or even a past life personality?

  6. 6

    CHERYL, I just know you want me to respond as a professional at Energy Spirituality, not a poet, right?

    As a poet, I could give opinions about what you are describing. It might make for an interesting comment for you to think about, and we could embark on a lovely dialogue.

    But your consciousness and deep experiences are not like literary criticism, nor are they mere theories to discuss. This is the quality of your aura (and your life) that you’re asking about.

    In order to answer this question about your very personal experience, we would need a session of RES Energy HEALING. I would go into the relevant chakra databanks and comment.

    * If there was a problem, I would do what I could to facilitate healing it.
    * If there was no problem, I would simply validate what was going on.

    Because I am a professional in the field of RES Energy HEALING (a.k.a. Energy Spirituality), I could give many theoretical guesses about what is going on with you, based on your question alone.

    I know you’re too polite to ask me to put these on the blog, but let me clarify for any of our Blog-Buddies who might be tempted to ask:

    A reading is not a healing. If you don’t have the perception and skills to detect what is happening in your aura, you don’t have the perception and skills to fix the problem, either. Not yet.

    Say, for instance, that you do Reiki. You might think, “Now that I know what the problem is, I’ll use my Reiki skills to solve it.”

    Many people think like this. Well, they’re fooling themselves. If your Reiki skills aren’t showing you a particular problem clearly, you can slather yourself with Reiki energy all day long. You won’t change those problems one bit.

    The last time I gave a class, “Jennie” sat in the audience, constantly tapping herself. Probably she thought she was doing a fine job of E.F.T. and soon her problems would disappear. But if you are constantly doing E.F.T., you’re not yet a skilled practitioner. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have to constantly be tapping yourself! With all respect, I’d suggest:

    * It’s time to have a session with a professional at E.F.T. (I would recommend Gwenn Bonnell. See (I haven’t experienced Gwenn as her client but as a friend; but I do admire her and know that she truly has professional-level skills with E.F.T.)

    *Or it’s time to try a new approach… such as a session of RES Energy HEALING.

    The same goes for Reiki and other perfectly fine healing modalities. Just because one has learned a skill set doesn’t mean that it fixes everything.

    All over the Internet, CHERYL, you can find questions like the one you have asked here. You’ll find answers that are conjecture, or a pleasant way to pass the time, or “interesting ideas.”

    To me, this is not a responsible way to address a very personal, and potentially very important, question.

    So, if you would like to have it answered, please set up a personal session with me.

  7. 7
    Cheryl says:

    Ouch. I didn’t mean to cause any offense. I guess I worded my comment poorly. I was just thinking out loud about the various possibilities I considered re: your question “How about you, Blog-Buddies, have you ever had such an experience? And, if so, what explanation did you used to give yourself?”

    I don’t have a problem with having the experience, so I wasn’t trying to request a reading nor a healing. If I did need help in some area, I know I can contact you for a session because I have already done that. I wouldn’t consider abusing the hospitality of your blog.

    Hope we’re still Blog Buddies,

  8. 8

    CHERYL, we are totally Blog-Buddies. You didn’t offend in the least bit. And I do hope I didn’t seem to be pouncing on you in my (perpetual) eagerness to teach the fine points about Deeper Perception.

    Isn’t tone the hard part of our online lives? Whether email or blog posts or comments, it can be so tricky to know the underlying feeling.

    In this case, Cheryl, the question I asked was about having THAT experience discussed in the post, but I can easily understand how that might have seemed as though I was asking for a kind of “Call for experiences with mirrors.” 😉

  9. 9
    Eleathea says:

    I loved reading this post, because it reminded me of some strange fascination I always have with mirrors. It started as a child, when I would stare in the mirror, trying to figure out if the reflection was really “me”. Mentally, I would even repeat my name over and over, thinking, Am I this girl? with this name? and this face and body? Really? If not, then who? or what?

    Over time, I would simply stare into my eyes, trying to see “something” behind my eyes, as if there were some kind of energy or essence there that would clue me in to my true identity. I knew better than to talk about these things to anyone!

    Eventually, I had a dream that seemed to provide an answer to my question of “Who am I?” In the dream, I was looking at my reflection in the mirror, when I suddenly noticed whitish specks in my hair, and that my hair was darker than normal. Worried that I had dandruff :), I rotated my head down to get a better look at my scalp.

    As I did so, the image of my hair started expanding, and the room disappeared, until I was hovering in the infinite and utterly silent blackness of space. What I thought was dandruff was actually stars shining brilliantly in the eternal vastness of the sky. So the answer to my question, “Who am I really”, was “You are the Universe”.

    After reading Rose’s posts and books on empathy (and having an informative reading with Rose), I can finally understand a little better why I was such a strange child! Glad to know others have had similar fun with mirrors…

    By the way, I now have an odd little mirror “ritual.” Whenever I’m feeling agitated or “not quite right,” I find myself drawn to the closest mirror, where I will just gaze into my eyes for several seconds. It always calms me down, almost like it reminds me of my own basic state, which is actually to feel calm, peaceful and centered. Unlike when I’m picking up a whole bunch of angst from God-knows-who! Maybe it’s a kind of “Coming Home” practice.

    Thanks, Rose, for providing a place where empaths can talk about things that few others will understand.

  10. 10

    ELEATHIA, you’re so welcome. The practice you have developed seems to me a perfectly servicable way of helping you to experience yourself at the level of soul.

    That will automatically be soothing, especially if you have been getting involved in unskilled, subconscious Empath Merges with other people — as described in my new book for empaths, BECOME THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE ROOM.

    However, I wouldn’t call this mirror technique an equivalent of the Coming Home Technique. (This particular technique, Blog-Buddies, is a big part of becoming a skilled empath, as explained in EMPOWERED BY EMPATHY.)

    Instead, the Coming Home Technique has you make the clearest contact possible at many different layers of yourself, not just soul but also spirit, connection to social reality, physical body awareness, intellect, mind, emotions.

    Like non-empaths, an empath can develop the habit of living in a way that emphasizes just one or two of these layers of self. For a non-empath, that simply brings limitation in life. But, for an empath, it will cause more STUFF to come into you from other people when you do unskilled, quick Empath Merges.

    Doing the Coming Home Technique can help to break this pattern (along with other practices described in both of my books to help empaths). Otherwise, that basic state of feeling “centered” could mean feeling “centered” in only one’s soul or only one’s intellect or emotions.

    For you, of course, all the practice you’ve had at experiencing yourself more fully and releasing STUFF will make any experience of yourself more clear and balanced.

    Keep up the good work, Eleathia, and thanks for sharing your experiences here.

  11. 11
    Catherine says:

    I rarely look in a mirror. I do not seek the physical image of myself…though I have never considered why.

  12. 12
    Wendi says:


    I *completely* understand what you were saying…the exact same thing happens to me!

    “When I look in the mirror I will see myself but my face can look physically different at times. Not like a whole different person, but enough of a difference that it sometimes shocks me.”

    After my mother passed away, at times the difference seemed to be her face mixed with mine. But, it’s not isolated to just her…I am many times looking at myself, morphed with others or something. It’s shocking, for sure! I know exactly what you’re talking about!!!

    When I was younger, I thought maybe there was something mentally wrong with me, but as I age I understand that I am simply more than what we’ve been raised to believe is “normal.” 🙂

    I’m so happy you shared. It’s always nice to see others experience similar things.

    I do understand what Rose is writing about, too. 🙂



  13. 13
    Lisa says:

    I remember looking at myself in the mirror and feeling unfamiliar with myself.

    I still do quite often. as I matured, this fact remained the same for me.

    I also note that very often, she seems to appear to change, as you all mentioned frequently. Usually slight differences, never anything largely notable.

  14. 14

    LISA, welcome to the blog. This is your first comment here, isn’t it?

    As you mature with the skill set of Empath Empowerment, it will be interesting what you find. Although you may always feel surprised in a way, looking in that mirror, your sense of identity can grow in ways that bring continuity and self-confidence.

    Concerning slight differences to the physical face itself, this is absolutely human. If you do face reading — physiognomy not just expression reading — you can interpret those changes.

    One type of face reading I offer has you supply photos of yourself at different times. I point out physical shifts, including subtle ones, and interpret them in terms of meaning.

    It’s inspiring, whether you do this type of face reading yourself or you have a professional do it for you.

  15. 15
    Eva rose masters says:

    Hi Rose,

    I like that you say different things about empaths. I fit the terms and im unskilled. As for mirrors I always played dress up in front of the mirror and act things out as a child. Would even cry in front of the mirror. These days after a few years of stress looking in the mirror is a rare occurrence apart from small hand held one’s. This is due to the fact I feel like I can’t tell where I physically am when I see my reflection and after I look away I can’t remember exactly what I looked like. Causes anxiety and heart palpitations.

  16. 16
    Lily says:

    Hi Rose, I’ve just come to your blog and am enjoying reading some articles and this is my first comment here. I just ordered your Empath Empowerment book a few minutes ago. I took the Empath Quiz #1 and I answered “true” to this quiz question. When I came to this particular article, I was blown away by your statement, “Sure I recognize that physical self. It’s part of me. But it sure ain’t all of me.” My feelings exactly! Many times in my life I would simply feel annoyed or frustrated that the emphasis in society is so focused on the physical appearance, for I always felt more connected with who I am inwardly, and sometimes not so much outwardly. I do have a question I haven’t seen yet addressed here, but it may be in the book (which I have yet to read.)Can this mirror phenomenon be connected to the feeling that one is more similar to another race/ethnicity than what is represented by the current skin color? Or does this have more to do with past life memories? Although my skin is one color, inside I’ve usually felt like I belong to a different race. And when people look at me and classify me by my skin color and make assumptions about who/what I am, I do feel misunderstood, much like the feelings of looking in the mirror: “Is that all there is?!” Thanks for any clarification on this topic and I’m looking forward to reading the book.

  17. 17

    Hi back, LILY.

    Welcome to this informal, sweet community.

    Regarding YOUR particular experiences with a mirror, what would resonate best surely would be information from reading your aura, rather than generalizations. This could be done in a personal session together, one-on-one. Or you could develop your aura reading skills a lot (a different skill set from the Empath Merge skills) and learn how to do that sort of research for yourself.

    Because the many options you mention might all apply to you. Or to others. Or none, and something else.

  18. 18

    That’s why I am very careful in writing books — and blog articles and comments as well…

    I’m careful to not provide that kind of general analysis.

    Instead, I analyze just things specific to the skill set being taught — as in “The Empowered Empath,” where you are one of the first readers in the world! Hooray!

  19. 19

    For future comments, LILY — and I look forward to reading them — please space for a paragraph after every sentence or two. And make a fresh comment after a para or two.

    Makes it easier to read.

    One of the secrets about this blog is that the comments are often the best part, even more fun and informative that the original articles.

    So, welcome to “Deeper Perception Made Practical.”

  20. 20
    Lily says:

    Hi again Rose,

    And thanks for the fast reply! Yes, I will look more into your suggestions. Many thanks!

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