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Death Wisdom, a Guest Post by JILL ERIN

Death Wisdom

Death Wisdom, from the perspective of Enlightenment

Death Wisdom. In this post JILL ERIN (in Enlightenment) shares her perspective on death. With family members and as a nurse. You may be moved, even inspired.

Blog-Buddy JEAN asked JILL ERIN about death in the context of our conversation around Hanging onto your STUFF, a Guest Post by Jill Erin. (See especially Comment 14 and the spirited dialogue initiated by CURIOUS AS EVER in the sequence at this post.)

Sure, the topic is considered grim. Yet, with JILL’s wisdom, dare I say, “Kind of beautiful”?

And reading between the lines, Blog-Buddies, you can appreciate JILL’s energetic literacy as she has helped others.

Death Wisdom. About Family Members

I am not sure what you want to know about death, Jean. I will make an assumption, from the sentence preceding your request that you are curious about death on the personal level of dealing with your elderly parents. If that assumption is wrong, just let me know.

As a nurse and as a daughter I dealt with many different scenarios of final moments before death.

My first experience was with my mother when I was 26 years old – and before I was a nurse. She was my best friend and she died within a month of having a heart attack – rather suddenly.

She knew she was going to die and tried to tell me, but I didn’t want to hear it or believe it.

I regretted that for a long time – the not allowing her to talk about it with me and me just listening and embracing that experience with her. But, I just was not ready to let her go. In fact, I know that her spirit hung around with me for about a month after she died until I finally told her she could leave.

I have shared in another post about how I dealt with my father’s death, many years later and much better prepared, myself, to embrace the whole experience and walk it with him.

Death Wisdom. Helping Others Transition

As a nurse, I always told the family:

Hearing is the last to go. Talk to the loved one even when he or she is a coma. Know that you are heard.

I did sit with some clients as they died and listened to them and held their hands as they, very lucidly, transitioned.

There was always calm acceptance.

Only in the code (i.e. cardiac arrest) deaths was there mayhem. But in those situations I always “talked” to the person after they were pronounced and told them to look for a being of light and follow that being.

I told them what I had read in Dr.Raymond Moody’s books about near death experiences – about the tunnel and all. I had read all of his books and all of Dr. Elisabeth Kubler Ross’s books so I just assumed they could hear me and that it would help calm them and help the transition be smoother and less confusing.

Death Wisdom. Another Person’s Death Is Not About YOU

Each person approaches death the way they live their life.

I just tried to listen and support them in the most compassionate way I could. Usually, just the presence of someone who was caring and accepting made for the easiest transitions.

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  1. 1
    Jean says:

    Thank you Jill Erin for once again sharing your wise insights and experiences – now around the topic of death.

    Your words and concepts are helpful to me now and will continue to be so as my path unfolds….with my parents and beyond.

    Seems to me Jill that all you have chosen to share fits the bill perfectly of whatever I happen to have asked you about – including this “usually considered grim” type of topic.

    I continue on my way with a lighter – and more knowledgeable – heart.

    Much gratitude to you, Jill, and of course…..to Rose!

  2. 2
    Primmie says:

    Jill, thank you so much for this guest post. I really appreciate knowing that hearing is the last sense to go.

    I’ve been close enough to death in the last year to know I don’t need to fear it. I have no desire to die, life is so full and beautiful, but I now know that when death comes I’ll be at peace with it.

  3. 3
    Elaine says:

    Beautiful post Jill.

  4. 4
    Jill Erin says:

    Rose,

    it is so perfect that you chose the Death character from Sir Terry Pratchett’s Disc World because that character is one of my all time favorite characters in his novels/movies. A very lovable character.

  5. 5
    Jill Erin says:

    Jean,

    I am so happy that what I shared was what you wanted now.

    Embrace this experience with your parents and you will find It will all unfold perfectly for you, for them, and for everyone else that your lives touch.

  6. 6
    Jill Erin says:

    Primmie,

    You and I go way back on this blog and you always touch a special soft spot in my heart. I always love your comments and insights here.

  7. 7
    Jill Erin says:

    Elaine,

    Thank you, too.

  8. 8
    Jean says:

    Jill,

    Felt the need to copy this bit below from your comment #6.

    “Embrace this experience with your parents and you will find It will all unfold perfectly for you, for them, and for everyone else that your lives touch.”

    So beautifully put.

    Thank you again, Jill.

  9. 9
    Colleen says:

    Thanks, Jill for your comments. As a nurse of many years I have been with adults, children, and wee ones as they have transitioned. I was aware early on that the sense of hearing was the last to go. I remember talking to coma patients in the ICU while I combed their hair, changed the sheets etc. A year or so later when one awakened she reported that she remembered being spoken to and cared for. I have also spoken to the non physical presence around many of my patients before and after death. I have had so many of these experiences that I could write a book. I am certain that many nurses have had similar experiences but are hesitant to share them.

  10. 10
    Primmie says:

    Jill I’m very touched that you write that. Thank you.

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