Deeper Perception Made Practical

How Aura Reading Can Help You with the SOCIAL Aspect of Personal Presence

Having a strong presence in your human life can be about more than energy

Having a strong presence in your human life can be about more than energy

Our conversation is coming along so productively. Thanks to all who have been commenting at our first article in this series about personal presence. Today let’s start to distinguish two separate things that are often confused when we yearn for a stronger, better presence:

  • The energy aspect
  • And the social aspect

Because man oh man, are they different! Yet it’s so human that, in our pain, in our longings, these two disparate aspects are often confused. Leading to problems. Sometimes big problems.

To set the stage, here’s a story that is (to me) hilarious. (But only in retrospect.)

Fashion Advice from an Unlikely Source

The year was 1974. The place? A hotel in Switzerland. Rooms were being rented out to teachers of the Transcendental Meditation Program.

A group of us initiators had flown in from America. Once arrived at the hotel, we learned that our guru, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, happened to be in the lecture hall. If we wished, we could see him.

Nobody else was there. (Note: This was a unique experience for me, out of all my Teacher Training Courses and so many Advanced Training courses. Of course, all that follows is described to the best of my recollection.)

Eagerly my TM buddies and I ran over to the stage where, as usual, Maharishi was sitting on his deerskin. Usually a pathetically slow runner, I got there first. No doubt,  love for my master gave wings to my legs….

A minute of face time one-on-one with my guru! Such a rare treasure! And I’d been working so hard as Co-Chairman of the TM center in Beverly Farms, Massachusetts. Yes, I stood in his glorious presence, maybe a foot away.

Maharishi looked me over. His voice rang out: “Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.”

Describing this to you, Blog-Buddies, I can still hear his voice — exactly the way he said each word, framing it in golden silence. I felt so loved, so special, so very grateful.

After the next pause, radiant with golden silence, Maharishi added:

“But you should dress better. Your clothing should be tip top. And wear clothes that fit.”

Then my guru turned away to give attention to the next in line.

What’s So Funny about That?

By now, at age 68, I’m a girly girl. For the past 15 years I have actually come to like clothes. And by the time I turned 60, I have even been able to notice whether or not clothing actually fits a person’s body. (Better late than never, right?)

Back in the day, I was 26 years old. According to conventional standards, I was at the height of my cuteness.

You and I can only imagine how atrocious my clothes and general grooming must have been in order for Maharishi to chide me in this way.

So, who was the man who was bestowing this fashion advice? A plump man in his late fifties, a fellow who displayed to the world a flowing white beard while hiding a long ponytail that he tucked into the back of his dhoti.

Yes, this fashion advice came from a man who wore a one-piece white garment.

Incidentally, several years later Maharishi helped to design a line of women’s clothing for his “Initiators” and “Governors of the Age of Enlightenment.” Clothing that was meant to be appropriately royal and dignified. All of us were encouraged to buy these “Siddha dresses.”

Unfortunately I have not been able to find a photo on the Internet, so let me describe what these were like: Very colorful fabric, like a sort of gift wrap imported from India. Made of silk. Extremely modest in cut; boxy, not sexy or attractive — apart from clearly looking expensive; sporting broad pleats that would wrinkle easily and would often have to be professionally cleaned and pressed.

Sure, Siddha dresses might be bought in a size that fit… yet you have never seen dresses that were more unflattering for every possible variation of a woman’s body.

Yes, I was solemnly offered fashion advice from this sartorial expert!

Even Maharishi Knew that Social Presence Usually Counts for More than Energetic Presence

And back in the day, I confused the two. By now, the categories are clear.

Have you, too, sometimes ignored the social presence factor — a.k.a. objective reality — in how you are treated?

Did you think, “It’s all about having charisma.” or “If only my spiritual presence were strong enough, everyone would respect me”?

Have you been so busy reading auras, or energy, that you have overlooked paying attention to human-level vibrational frequencies — good old objective reality?

About that last question, one great benefit of developing aura reading skills is this. With Stage THREE Energetic Literacy, you’re not drifting along noticing energies all day long. Or off-and-on. (All this being the mark of Stage ONE Energetic Literacy, which could be defined as plenty of talent. Zero skills. Like me, back at age 26.)

With Stage Three Energetic Literacy, you use your good aura reading skills when you choose to consciously learn information. It’s Technique Time, not random moments. And therefore you are much more likely to pay attention to objective reality, including whether you really want to wear the equivalent of a Siddha dress.

Even if you can find one — and it fits you, tip top — that’s still not likely to win you many points in objective reality. 😉

Below, Please Share Your Wisdom and Experience about Strengthening Social Presence

  1. What can a person do about clothing and appearance?
  2. How about body language and posture?
  3. How about using your voice, pacing your words?
  4. What else helps a person to gain respect socially?

Beyond That, More

Folks in spiritual shutdown don’t have a problem with forgetting about objective reality. But folks in spiritual addiction sure do.

It’s very common for spiritually-oriented people — even folks in human-based spirituality (or even Enlightenment) to not be as clear as they might be about distinguishing objective reality from subjective reality, and solving problems at human vibrational frequencies.

In my next blog post of this series, I’ll be commenting a bit about that.

But for now, I can’t wait to read your responses to the four questions listed above. Plus whatever you have to say on this sorting-out topic concerning strong personal presence.

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Join the Discussion

  1. 1
    Rosanna Tufts says:

    Join ToastMasters, and complete the 10 projects in the Competent Communicator manual. It will take you about a year to 18 months.

    I guarantee, by the time you get this far, you will have better presence — at least the Social kind. Your Energetic presence may also improve.

  2. 2
    Christine says:

    As someone studying costume design fashion books like “Life in Color” by Jeffrey Garza and any book by Tim Gunn are definitely useful for finding your own style.

  3. 3
    Kira says:

    Gaining respect socially with clothing and appearance changes depending on the social milieu.

    You can gain respect in social circles that highly value independence by wearing wacky prints and colors that stand out. Other circles value elegance, and others value businesslike attire.

  4. 4
    Kira says:

    I don’t necessarily think consciously about it, but every time I pick out clothes to wear, I’m taking into consideration what kind of person I want to be seen as by the people who will see me wherever I’m going.

  5. 5
    Kira says:

    There’s an interesting TED talk about body language by Amy Cuddy; a study showed that “hero poses” (strong poses that superheroes are often depicted in, such as standing with feet spread and hands on hips) actually make the person posing that way act more worthy of respect. I found it interesting that the pose works on both the viewer and the poser.

  6. 6
    Kira says:

    I can tell you how *not* to pace your words: letting them tumble out rapid-fire just seems to overwhelm people. They can’t understand you that fast.

    I try not to do that, but sometimes my brain is just moving too fast to keep up with.

    It’s part of the reason I prefer written/typed communication in many cases. (Editing is really useful.)

  7. 7
    Kira says:

    When acting, I can pace my voice appropriately because the lines are not being thought of on the spot (most of the time; I’ve had a few instances of needing to ad-lib).

    So if I ever need to make an important speech, or even just talk to one or more people about something I really want support for, I will almost certainly need to write a speech and memorize it.

  8. 8
    David B says:

    (laughs) Funny example, Rose. I can relate. The Dress for Success program became very big in TM circles. Many had no clue.

    When I became interested in teaching TM, I had long hair and generally wore tshirt and jeans. Many came out of that milieu.

  9. 9
    David B says:

    When I got back from France with my tailored 3-piece French suit, I was surprised how differently I was treated by people on the street, in shops, etc.

    An appearance of success and flair made a surprising difference.

    (it should be noted, a 70’s French suit had a very different look than an American one. Lapel points that came up to the shoulders, snug from the waist to the knees, then large bell bottoms. Add silk tie and pocket watch chain with sapphire stone…)

  10. 10
    David B says:

    Objective reality? What a concept! (laughs)

  11. 11
    Lilian says:

    Thanks for sharing Rose. And also for other’s comments. 🙂

  12. 12
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    Rose, this made me chuckle.


  13. 13
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    1. Quit eating junk (and any all food with chemical additives); eat fresh vegetables and fruits and quality fats. Ditto soda.

  14. 14
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    2. Walk everyday and so some form of regular exercise

  15. 15
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    3. Get at least basic dental work done and braces if needed (most people do need them, and the benefits go beyond cosmetic)

  16. 16
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    4. Get a good haircut and keep your hair combed, or else wear a ponytail / wig / scarf / hat.

    If you’re a bald man, well then, be bald!

    If you’re a bald woman and you don’t want to wear a wig or hat or scarf, I really don’t know what to say about that.

  17. 17
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    5. Wear clothes and accessories that, whatever style they may be, are clean, comfortable, in good repair, and express your respect for yourself as you present yourself to the others you would expect / aim to interact with during your day.

  18. 18
    Anonymously Anonymous says:

    While standing in lines at places such as the grocery store or the airport, it so often occurs to me that most people are terribly uncomfortable in their bodies and their strategy is to do their best to ignore and hide them.

    And it doesn’t help that they are addicted to junk and spend all day staring at screens of some sort.

    It seems to me that as humans we walk a path along the abyss of many, many addictions.

  19. 19

    PS Many older people who are suffering from even mild cognitive decline have trouble keeping themselves socially presentable– issues of hygiene but also choice of clothing– and, alas, they are treated accordingly.

    It seems to me that in our culture, as one gets older, one becomes more vulnerable, and so it becomes increasingly vital, even part of self-defense, to present well.

    There are a lot of vultures out there. They look for people who look careless, which is to say, clueless.

  20. 20
    Amanda says:

    Clothing and appearance – as Lynette so perceptively puts it, anything outside the bell curve will get you noticed but often in a negative way.

    I remember being in a totally relaxed patch and forgetting to brush my hair. I was followed round a shop by people who clearly took unbrushed hair to mean “potential shoplifter”!

    So I would add that groomed hair will let you pass muster socially.

  21. 21
    Amanda says:

    Clothes make such a difference. Fitted feminine clothing gets a completely different reaction to baggy jeans and a t-shirt.

    Again an example. I dressed up once to buy a car. Nothing extravagant, but I wore a well-fitting dress.

    My car purchase was rushed through by the manager dealing with me, much to the annoyance of his subordinate – a nice and fair-minded man who was trying to deal with a whole queue of people.

    It was a marked difference in treatment.

  22. 22
    Amanda says:

    Body language and posture is to me our greatest communication tool but this is precisely because it’s impossible to fake.

    You have to feel and express that feeling with the whole body and stance.

  23. 23
    Amanda says:

    Voice and pacing of words is so useful.

    I did a radio interview on local radio and listening to it afterwards, noticed how many ‘um’ and equivalent words I put in.

    Not good projection!

    Radio presenters on the other hand never say ‘er’ or ‘um’ and each word is chosen, paced and projected with confidence.

    Fascinating! I’m sure this can be trained.

  24. 24
    Amanda says:

    Finally, what else helps a person to gain respect socially?

    I would say it’s about appearing successful in one way or another. People flock to perceived success and hang back from perceived failure.

    It’s also about conformity and consistency.

    Our local town has some lovely individual coffee shops which are deserted now that Costa, with its ubiquitous branding and predictable delivery of the same flavour, has opened its doors.

  25. 25
    Amanda says:

    Now it feels odd to sit in an individual but empty coffee shop when there’s a buzz of conversation going on a few doors down the road.

  26. 26
    Amanda says:

    A final point. How to successfully negotiate a busy street.

    I worked this out when I livwd just off Oxford Street in the centre of London.

    I woukd fix my eyes on the pavement a few metres ahead and walk unstoppably briskly.

    Everybody moved out of the way.

    If I looked up, it was the same old round of dodging and collisions.

    So I think people very much react to a statement of unstoppable confidence such as that.


  27. 27
    Jane says:

    I loved reading this Rose – what a lovely story, very much made me smile & chuckle.

    Okay – well, to go for no.1 – clothing/appearance – I just go for things that fit well and feel good.

  28. 28
    Jane says:

    That probably sounds very vague – so what I mean is, as much as I love great designs, fashion, colours, textures and fabrics – if I love it, it fits, and feels okay (and matches the weather okay, i.e. jumpers in winter, wellies in rain, t-shirts in summer) … then I pretty much go for it.. ..(in theory, maybe in practice its nothing like that!!!) 🙂 ….

  29. 29
    Jane says:

    (Note; jumpers are sweaters, wellies are wellington-boots that you wear on your feet in the mud & rain)

    I’ve no idea if that was the type of response you were looking for, I may have missed the point – but loved the story & comments 🙂

  30. 30
    Alan says:

    What can a person do about clothing and appearance?

    However you want; trust your gut when you put those clothes on; don’t even worry; those people judging you based on your clothes are probably not worth your time anyways 🙂

  31. 31
    Alan says:

    How about body language and posture?

    Best thing I did was to look back at past videos or pictures of yourself if you have any.

    If you don’t like something about your body language and posture, adjust yourself to how you’d like to view yourself.

    Generally, a straighter more up-right back displays a sense of self-worth and confidence–something people pick up on!

  32. 32
    Alan says:

    Also a big one someone taught me is “smiling with your eyes.”

    You know how your eyes change when you genuinely smile? Mimic that without smiling as you go out through your day and you may notice your whole persona change.

  33. 33
    Alan says:

    How about using your voice, pacing your words?

    Often the recipient of your voice and words will give you the cues you need to adjust your voice, pace your words, or to tell you to just stop running your mouth.

    And generally, a mid-way pace, free from stuttering and speaking from the belly often sounds the most powerful.

  34. 34
    Alan says:

    What else helps a person to gain respect socially?

    Respecting yourself (but proving it!).

  35. 35

    It sure is fun, reading these comments. Interesting ideas!

    Just to share my perspective a bit, I would suggest that you Blog-Buddies avoid the tip in Comment #32. Unless you’re a professional actor, and you’re in a role.

    “Mimic that without smiling as you go out through your day and you may notice your whole persona change.”

    Sure, there will be a change. It will happen because consistent playacting will muck up your auric modeling.

  36. 36

    Having a personality as a human being does not mean the same thing as adding on a “persona.” A persona means playacting.

    Subconsciously people can tell it’s happening. For one thing, it shows up in auric modeling.

    People like me, who aren’t enchanted by fakery, will be distinctly unimpressed.

    Just saying.

  37. 37

    As for Comment #30, this could be taken as a great justification for not noticing objective reality and which clothing choices are appropriate for a particular real-life, social situation.

    Personally, I’d place more trust in the advice in the “it fits” part of Comment #28 and all of Comment #17. (My guess is that ALAN already does this, and this has become such a habit, he didn’t mention it. :-))

  38. 38
    Alan says:

    Haha I knew I’d get wrecked for comment #30. But you’re right ALAN does do this (re: comment #37) TO me, noticing objective reality is trusting my gut. Knowing something fits is felt in my gut. Dressing for a social situation is based on my gut feeling.

  39. 39
    Alan says:

    Interesting thoughts on what you (ROSE) felt in comment #35. But isn’t changing your body-posture or consciously changing the pace of your voice, also “playacting?”

  40. 40
    Julie says:

    I really get how different energetic presence is from social presence, from my own experience.

    I have no trouble drawing attention, or drawing people’s eyes. Without effort.

    But knowing what to do with that attention is a different matter. Knowing what to do with it in behavior – what to say, what to do.

    Socially, in relationships. It’s very different.

  41. 41
    Julie says:

    And also maintaining a certain standard of behavior. Being noticed, there is no distinction between being noticed for good behavior versus being noticed for bad behavior.

    Both are equally noticed!

  42. 42
    Julie says:

    It’s easy to be at my best when all conditions are ideal. Which isn’t all that often.

    The rest of the time – life gets in the way. It’s busy, sometimes messy.

    Having grace under pressure is a challenge.

    And having grace under pressure, while being watched – ditto.

  43. 43
    Julie says:

    About clothing, I did have a phase where I bought many new clothes. Every day I would wear a different outfit, not repeating.

    In addition to the boost to my mood was the response from others:

    A very image-conscious coworker stopped me and proclaimed “This does not go unnoticed!”

  44. 44
    David B says:

    Some sales people can be quite perceptive. I once visited a car dealership and he accurately guessed I was a police officer even though I was casually dressed.

    And yes, there is definitely voice and announcer training available. Diction, enunciation, pacing to fit the available time slot, etc. You get such jobs with work samples.

  45. 45
    David B says:

    Popularity of places is a curious thing. There was a restaurant in my neighborhood that always had lineups. Very gradually, that faded. I went in and found the food just OK. 50’s style diner but there’s a few of those around.

    Why was it so popular? Because it was popular?

  46. 46
    David B says:

    (laughs) Yep, on crossing a street. If you launch out in a crosswalk, cars generally stop.

    However, I’d not take that as universal. In some places it’s required. In some, it’s a fools game.

  47. 47
    David B says:

    You remind me of another feature of voice training – smiling with your voice. It’s absolutely necessary in advertising. Not for news.

    It’s not a smile on the face, it’s voice tone.

  48. 48
    David B says:

    (laughs) Good point Rose.
    Voice announcers and broadcasters are a form of acting.

    But as Rosanna mentioned back at comment 1, it can still be useful to become more conscious of how we present. Then we can make better choices.

  49. 49
    Brandi says:

    This post has opened my mind and now I’m wiser.

    I used to be one of those who thought that my energetic presence was making a statement more than how I presented myself-especially since I have less stuff.

    I feel all shiny and bright inside and I thought that made my social presence factor increase.

  50. 50
    Brandi says:

    Recently I socialized with a new person and the feedback I heard from my friend was they said my clothes are too baggy!

    This after sharing a great conversation and me just being me (and I like me).

  51. 51
    Brandi says:

    Objective Reality is here to stay.


    My experience has included hurt in a myriad of ways of not meeting or unable to meet conventional beauty/fashion/fitness/trends etc. all of which would probably make my social presence stronger.

  52. 52

    ALAN, it’s great that you know what you want and thoroughly believe in living as you choose to do. Your sharing at this blog is appreciated, too.

    Please, however, do not misrepresent my Comment #35. I did not share a feeling. I shared an idea based on what I have experienced through using skills of energetic literacy.

  53. 53

    In response to your question, ALAN, in your Comment #39, straightening up your posture is not playacting. It’s how you move your body.

    Unless you were performing, purposely taking on a role.

    Speaking at a pace that works for you in a social interaction is different than manipulating your speech to give a particular impression.

  54. 54

    DAVID B, I agree heartily with you and ROSANNA TUFTS, related to Comments #48 and 1. And JULIE and BRANDI, what wonderful insights.

    My favorite line, “It’s easy to be at my best when all conditions are ideal. Which isn’t all that often.” Haha.

  55. 55
    Lilian says:

    Brandi: It’s interesting how far differences in how you feel are noticed by others.

    For me, I’ve always tried to be friendly, considerate and cheerful no matter how I feel.

    It’s been interesting how much people can not pick up on what you feel inside unless you make it clear to them….

  56. 56
    Lilian says:

    Certainly, feeling more bright and shiny gives you more energy to invest in yourself in terms of clothes and doing things you enjoy.

    And looking better and having more stories to share does make you have more social presence…

  57. 57
    Alan says:

    Sorry Rose, you’re right! Poor choice of words on my part, regarding comment #39.

  58. 58
    Alan says:

    ^^ In response to comment #53

  59. 59

    ALAN, how sweet of you, that Comment #57. No apology is needed.

    Thank you for understanding that this is an educational blog. Every single person who contributes here, or lurks, is learning. Including your blog monitor!

  60. 60
    Dana K. says:

    There is a saying for what’s popular being popular bc it’s popular and what’s not popular continuing to be unpopular bc it’s unpopular.

    “Empty bar syndrome”.

  61. 61
    Dana K. says:

    As I was thinking of this, I thought of another piece: presence has to do with my side of the equation.

    Respecting myself and others and being comfortable and engaging socially.

    But not to the degree where I’m trying to get a certain type of reaction or to the degree that I’m actually manipulating others by my presentation.

  62. 62

    How interesting, DANA K.

    Do you have any idea where the term “empty bar syndrome” comes from?

    Can you tell us a bit more about it? About time there was a term for this besides “famous for being famous.”

  63. 63

    About your Comment #61, you wrote, “Respecting myself and others and being comfortable and engaging socially.
    But not to the degree….”

    Not sure I understand what you meant here. Surely you weren’t trying to suggest that a person who is really comfy with others, or has mastered engaging socially, is an expert at acting like a phony (but doing this convincingly)!

  64. 64
    Ann says:

    I love this discussion! Am emerging from being an avid lurker.

    As an empath, I have had a love-hate relationship with this fact of human nature.

    At times, I dress with incredible intention as with my recent job interview that I had to nail, which I did. *squee!*(read that somewhere Aussie)

  65. 65
    Ann says:

    Also knew I had to speak up and tell the interview committee who I was along with my experience and knowledge, not just “unskilledly” merge with them and hope they could mind-read how great I would be.

  66. 66
    Ann says:

    I actually sat at Starbucks an hour before and wrote down all of my gifts for this particular job.

    In the recent past, I wouldn’t have taken this outward interview process as seriously, thinking that the committee would simply understand who I am by being with me.

  67. 67
    Ann says:

    I feel so much more confident knowing that everyday people are not mind readers and I have to speak up to let them know my opinions and life experience, etc..

    Also, it helps tremendously that I have “dialed back”, a la Rose, in these interactions, so that I am not invested in such a deep way.

    I now have energy and the confidence to participate in a much more shallow, yet ironically, more meaningful way.

  68. 68
    Ann says:

    Recently, I bought an expensive dress to continue to free up this part of myself, and also am intentionally dressing more nicely when I go out as part of my personal growth in this area; and, this, for myself, not for other people — which I always begrudged.

    This discussion, and the whole blog, for that matter, has really confirmed for me this trajectory in my life.

  69. 69
    Ann says:

    Thank you, Rose, for talking about things that seemed like “no-brainers” for the non-empaths among us, but for us, are incredibly necessary to balance out our predisposition to go deep and shun the “shallow”.

    Such a validation. Thank you all.

  70. 70
    Dana K. says:

    Yes well I used to work for someone that used the term “empty bar syndrome” mostly in reference to his marketing plan which included some things like buying Facebook likes and YouTube views.

    He would launch internet products but part of the problem when you sell something online (especially when it may or may not be what you say it is) is that you need to appear as an expert already.

    These are a few of the ways he got around that. Otherwise I don’t know where it might have come from.

  71. 71
    Dana K. says:

    What I meant about “to the degree” is that at some point of thinking about my presentation and outfits and whatnot, I suppose I’d cross into overthinking it and maybe even further into almost being manipulative.

    So what I meant is respecting myself Etc.

  72. 72
    Dana K. says:

    As genuine but very possible to “try too hard” to where I might not be achieving that at all…

    where phony is on the other end of the spectrum.

    So in the end exactly how I come across to others, to a degree, has little of my concern.

    I mean I care, but I’m not managing it…that’s what I meant.

  73. 73

    ANN, you’re so welcome. What a useful contribution to our topic here.

    Wonderful insights, beautifully expressed!

  74. 74

    DANA K., what you meant was important. Thanks for the clarifications. 🙂

  75. 75
    Irene says:

    I was once mistakenly assumed to be a police officer by hospital staff.

    I was in the waiting room while a riding buddy was treated for his (minor) motorcycle accident. It was summertime, and I was dressed in in my biker gear: boots, black riding pants and a thickly padded jacket with big shoulders.

  76. 76
    Irene says:

    I walk and sit differently in my gear. I even slouch different. My feet end up planted further apart and my body tends to be more square to the front. My arms rest a bit further from my body.

  77. 77
    Irene says:

    Some of this comes from the gear I’m wearing – it’s hard to pull your arms in tight when your elbow pads hold your arms in a bit of a curve. And my shoulders look confident with that padding, no matter what they’re doing inside my jacket.

    Some of the change comes from what I had been doing in the hours previous – out with the fresh air whipping by my face as I zipped along a mountain highway at dusk.

    Plus the knowledge that there are far fewer women who ride shifted my attitude some as well.

  78. 78
    Irene says:

    I’m also tall, reasonably fit-looking, don’t wear makeup (on bike trips especially) and had slicked back hair tousled from my helmet.

    Apparently all this added up to a social presence that equaled police officer. It was quite interesting what a difference clothes, posture and grooming can make and how others interpret that.

  79. 79
    Lilian says:

    Ooh, motorcycle. I’ve sometimes fancied getting one of those.

  80. 80
    Lilian says:

    Also, why should we want to be judged on our energy? Rose reckons that karma comes from what we do and say, so to an extent, what does it matter?

  81. 81
    Lilian says:

    I say because Rose did some aura readings on some people close to me in this life and I was shocked at how much they struggle internally with some things.

  82. 82
    Lilian says:

    Considering the extent of their internal struggle, you can see that in their behaviour and communication they are really trying.

  83. 83
    Lilian says:

    As an empath (of whatever kind) I’ve realised that pre-judging people on their energy isn’t fair. They might surprise you.

    If people have already acted a certain way, then OK, do a reading and figure out what was happening.

  84. 84
    Irene says:

    Riding a motorcycle is really great, Lilian. I highly recommend it. 🙂

    I’m anxiously waiting the time when my physical health improves to the point I can ride again (and my soul thrill aura reading for it isn’t so abysmal!)

  85. 85
    Irene says:

    I think I’ve noticed something similar to what you describe in #83. Noticing people’s energies with unskilled techniques (like unskilled empath merge or just the “vibe” I get from them) is unreliable.

    It gets muddied with my own preconceptions and Stuff and is just a mess all around. I think that’s stage one energetic literacy.

  86. 86
    Irene says:

    It is much better to act based on what they actually say and do, objective reality, surface level.

    And then, if necessary, do an effective technique for deeper perception in my technique time.

  87. 87
  88. 88
    EmilyH says:

    Part of all of this seems like the inability to accept being human.

    Talking perfectly so other people are attracted to your way of being. Going along with social norms. Basically using judgement or perception to say how slow fast someone is talking, how jolly or how well they are dressed.

  89. 89
    EmilyH says:

    Do we not respect people who practice the art of imperfection?

    Maybe the key is to understand how much this plays into our happiness..

  90. 90
    EmilyH says:

    Relating to comment #63, I started to wonder if anybody is really born with social skills. Is that a natural part of being a human or are they formulated?

    If they are formulated then are these formulations natural as a part of how we respond to our environment or do we have to adjust to them in a phony type of way?

  91. 91
    EmilyH says:

    If many people aren’t particularly fond of you socially how is that going to effect your authenticity?

  92. 92

    EMILYH, among your thoughtful questions, I think that the one you posed in Comment #90 is quite easy to answer.

    Skills are learned. That simple.

    Any skill you might think of, from combing your hair to driving a car. It is learned.

    So you select skills you wish to learn, like those in RES, and then you learn them.

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