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The Narcissist Spotting Way of Life

Narcissist Spotting. Do you think you’ve gotten really good at spotting narcissists? (Like that’s supposed to be a good thing!)

The Narcissist Spotting Way of Life. Despite being a popular form of self-help today, hunting for narcissists could hurt.

Hurt more than it helps.

And yes, I mean all the common varieties of today’s trendy hobby. Such a big deal in collective consciousness today. As shown by search engines. Really, look at this sad array of victim porn!

  1. Label Narcissists – 3,050,000 hits
  2. Narcissist Traits – 36,600,000  hits
  3. Spot Narcissists –  1,960,000 hits
  4. Narcissistic Abuse – 26,600,000 hits
  5. And, unbelievably? Narcissist Prayer – 4,300,000  hits

Compared to What?

Opposite to narcissism victimology, people could gain more success in life. (And maybe spiritual awakening.) By researching:

  1. “Energy Spirituality” – 181,000 hits (Only today my first page on Google shows only 2 exact hits.)
  2. “Chakra Databanks” – 5,780 hits (Only today my first page on Google shows only 3 exact hits.)
  3. “Energetic Literacy” –  14,100 hits
  4. “Age of Awakening” –  604,000 hits
  5. “Age of Awakening Enlightenment”6 hits (Yes, you read that right.)

How crazy is that? Five of the most important concepts in personal growth today! Versus all that narcissism self-pity. And does the latter make life better? Really?

Perhaps you’ve seen our most recent article here at the blog: “Narcissists. The Worst Way They Hurt You.

Let’s investigate the consequences of making life about who’s a narcissist. Or how they’re out to get you. To help, I’ll direct energetic literacy skills toward some folks who are popular these days. (Head-scratchingly popular!) Reading auras of Three Influential Narcissist Spotting Experts.

But First, 5 Reasons to AVOID Narcissist Spotting as a Way of Life

  1. Paying a lot of attention to narcissists can distract you from living. My last post gave you an example of this.
  2. If you look for narcissists everywhere, you’ll see them constantly.
  3. Unless you’re a mental health practitioner, you don’t have the skills to discern different mental health problems. (Like narcissism.)
  4. And pop psychology doesn’t credential you to do therapy on yourself. (Neither would mental health credentials, actually.) Though so many people persuade themselves otherwise. Like they can actually become their own psychotherapists. Incidentally, that foolish notion has 230 MILLION hits.
  5. You can learn better ways to protect yourself than dwelling on narcissists. (See the final post of this three-part series.)

WHY I’ll Research Three Top Narcissist Spotters

Of course, I don’t know what these folks before they found this calling. But their own auras matter. What’s going on with them now, advising vulnerable people.

Every YouTube video and every book… bears the imprint of that person’s point of view. Aura-level, that’s called “auric modeling.” And you can read about what that means here.

HOW I’ll Research These Popular Narcissist Spotters

First of all, I’ll use the system of Aura Reading Through All Your Senses®. Or, to put it another way, I’ll use Stage 3 Energetic Literacy. (As explained in this video.) (If you like it, please give it a thumb’s up.)

To get one chunk more technical… and just so you know that I’m not doing some random rant… do you know about chakra databanks? Unless you’re clear about what they are — not just guessing — might I suggest? Read this article about chakra databanks. Then you’ll be all set to understand what I’m doing here.

Second, here is what I’ll be doing with each of the three experts below.

  • I’ll tell you which photo I’ve used to read that person’s aura. Since, once you’ve got Stage 3 Energetic Literacy, every photo is an AURA photo.
  • I’ll research the Root Chakra Databank for Presence in the Room. Since this reveals how, energetically, a person makes a first impression. Like “naughty or nice.”
  • New readers here, did you know? I’m an Empath Coach, as well as a teacher of aura reading. Well, yes. And so I’m going to describe that person’s degree of sensitivity: Sensitive, Highly Sensitive, Empath, or Highly INsensitive. Researching that because many HSPs and empaths believe that narcissists, energy vampires, etc.can ruin their lives. (Nonsense! If you learn the system of Empath Empowerment®, you’ll find a very different approach. One that results in powerful empath skills and, altogether, a happier life.)
  • Finally, I’ll research the Heart Chakra Databank for Emotional Self-Honesty. That’s one way to discern, “Does this expert really believe what he or she is saying? And what are the emotional nuances, at an energetic and subconscious level?”

Now, let’s get going!

Narcissist Spotting Expert #1. Richard Grannon

Mr. Grannon is a Spartan Life Coach. Surely he’d qualify as a narcissist spotter. Since he’s published a video about “The Fastest, Easiest Test For Narcissism.”

Here’s a link to his YouTube video, which I paused at 1:38.

Root Chakra Databank for Presence in the Room

Symbolic Size is 5 inches. Quite close to shutdown.

Brimming with anger, rage, righteous indignation.

Gee, that’s tough. But I’m not sure that somebody who is doing that badly in his emotional life… Is he the best person to help others fare better in their emotional lives?

Sensitive, Highly Sensitive, Empath, or Highly INsensitive

Highly INsensitive. Practically speaking, when it comes to noticing nuances about people, what they’re really like… Perhaps Richard’s talents lie elsewhere.

Heart Chakra Databank for Emotional Self-Honesty

Symbolic Size is 2 inches. Very close to shutdown.

Full of rage and righteous indignation. And, at the time of this video still, guess what? Richard Gannon has got quite a collection of Energetic Subroutines going on. Sure, it’s very likely they could leave him, if he had some RES Energy HEALING session. But in terms of what’s going on at the time of the video, it’s like this:

The angrier he feels, the more he believes that he’s being REALLY HONEST.

In Conclusion, Energetically Speaking

Angry people may flock to him. But Mr. Gannon may not accomplish much besides helping people feel good about having all that anger.

Narcissist Spotting Expert #2. Angie Atkinson

Evidently she’s a “Mind Games” expert. Her YouTube video teaches you how to “to Beat the Narcissist At Their Own Game.” You can watch this offering by Ms. Atkinson by clicking here.

To find an image suitable for aura reading, I just stopped the video at 0:01 minutes.

Root Chakra Databank for Presence in the Room

Symbolic Size is 18 feet.

Oh, poor kid, such a mess! It’s as though Angie is holding herself together with duct tape. More specifically, this chakra databank suggests that she has had many horrible experiences in this life. Unfortunately, what else shows? She has been dwelling upon them, analyzing them.

And, in her case, this has only intensified the mess in her aura. (Often, analyzing one’s pain only makes it worse. For example, this link will give you a recorded aura reading with an RES client who had previously tried that approach.)

Sensitive, Highly Sensitive, Empath, or Highly INsensitive

Quite insensitive. Although I wouldn’t be surprised if she considers herself to be an HSP.

In my experience with clients who are new to RES, what’s pretty common? Equating inner suffering with “I must be very, very sensitive.”

Aw, life really can be hard. But I don’t think empath coaches and HSP coaches do people any favors by encouraging this confusion. Skilled aura reading definitely helps this empath coach to sort it out.

Heart Chakra Databank for Emotional Self-Honesty

Symbolic Size is 1/8 inch. Technically, shut down. Might improve later, but for now, not working.

Feeling so strongly like a victim… Sadly, this is shutting down Ms. Atkinson’s ability to know what’s true about her own emotions. Likewise, interpreting them to herself could be pretty chancy.

In Conclusion, Energetically Speaking

When people are hurting emotionally, especially when they’re feeling like victims, they can really like Angie Atkinson. Aura-wise, she’d be very relatable, extremely comforting.

However, does she have the strength or clarity to help people get past their sense of victimhood? Maybe not, at this time.

Narcissist Spotting Expert #3. Trevor J. Freeman

Introducing Trevor, maybe the best way is to introduce this Free Man is… How his YouTube video gives you a really good view of his tattoos. And they wouldn’t show that well on a podcast. (Incidentally, if you’re curious about what I’ve learned about tattoos from aura reading research, here’s Link #1. And then Link #2.)

What’s on offer from this Narcissism Expert? This video’s subject is “How The Narcissist Gets Away With Cheating.” And I just gave you the link, if you’d like to watch.

For today’s aura reading, I paused the video at 0:04 minutes.

Root Chakra Databank for Presence in the Room

Symbolic Size is 80 feet. Somewhat over-functioning.

Oh, what a holy mess of shame, remorse, self-hatred, self-pity. Also I find a courageous resolve to move forward and make life better.

Sure wakes up my heart of compassion! But hey, he’s not my Energy Spirituality client for an Energy HEALING session. Rather, he’s out there trying to help others. Sigh!

Sensitive, Highly Sensitive, Empath, or Highly INsensitive

Yes, I’d call Mr. Anonymous an HSP. However, it’s worth noting that he has done a whole lot of things to mess up his system. (Was it sex, substances? He’d know. We don’t have to.)

Heart Chakra Databank for Emotional Self-Honesty

Symbolic Size is 1/8 inch. Quite shut down, for now.

Look, the emotional self-honesty can only come back when he’s not living in agony. So much STUFF in his aura!

Maybe you know, we have this motto about Rosetree Energy Spirituality. “STUFF can always, always, always be healed.”

In Conclusion, Energetically Speaking

Due to his auric modeling, Mr. Anonymous could definitely appeal to people who feel like victims. In a sort of emotional recovery!

Look, I know that ideas are rife in collective consciousness about how wonderful this is. Like how victims are ideal guides, since they’ve been there.

Personally, I strongly disagree. If the advice giver is in really bad shape, aura-wise… and maybe emotionally too… ouch! Sympathizing for a person like the Anonymous Narcissism Expert is one thing. Expecting him to lift you up? Quite the opposite is probably the result of watching his videos.

And Altogether in Conclusion

Not for the first time, we’re finding online examples of unwarranted popular trust. Like blind empaths leading the blind.

Like another example? How helpful victim talk is supposed to be.

And most helpful of all, let’s conclude this three part series… by adding one more article to this series. An article about alternatives to casting in your lot with the (probably, mostly, pretty messed up) Narcissism Experts.

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  1. 1
    Anymously Anonymous says:

    Rose, this is fascinating to read, thank you.

  2. 2

    You’re welcome. As a writer you know, ANYMOUSLY, people reveal themselves in so many ways.

    Like their choice of life work. The YouTube videos they create. And then, when you want a really clear view, their auras!

  3. 3
    Steve says:

    I’ve always found the fad for blaming narcissists to be puzzling.

    Your aura readings helped clear up a lot for me. Like, if these three are some of the leaders, they just might comfort other people who feel really bad. Give them a cause.

  4. 4
    Christine says:

    Two out of three of these narcissism experts are insensitive. This intrigues me because of the hue and cry from certain empath experts — not you, Rose — who make it sound as if it’s the so-sensitive empaths who find narcissists troubling.

    I never believed those empath authorities who blame narcissists for how unskilled empaths suffer. Now, more than ever!

  5. 5
    Christine says:

    I mean, I guess I should say, LESS than ever.

  6. 6

    Really, STEVE. Birds of a feather flock together. Like, pigeons will always be pigeons.

    But the tricky part is, what happens when birds who aren’t really pigeons get swept up in a migration toward Narcissist Breaking-News Land?

  7. 7

    Point well taken, Christine.

    Notions about narcissists (or “emotional vampires”) ruining the lives of empaths… turns empaths into such victims.

  8. 8

    By contrast, what have I found when teaching Empath Empowerment®?

    Unskilled empaths are less effective than other people.
    But skilled empaths are more effective than other people

  9. 9
    Oscar Manuel says:

    Fascinating, Rose! Thank you!

  10. 10
    Christine says:

    That’s pretty funny. I hadn’t quite put it together until you responded to my comment. But NONE of those three narcissism experts is an empath.

    Whereas if narcissists were really the big scary monsters that some empath experts write about, you’d expect that field to be dominated by empaths.

  11. 11
    Christine says:

    Brave empaths fighting back against the people who have ruined their lives.

    Definitely funny, now that I think about it. Insensitive narcissism experts, why not?

  12. 12

    OSCAR MANUEL, thanks for weighing in.

    Even quick comments like this one say a lot. Blog-Buddies, never feel shy about adding quick comments.

  13. 13

    CHRISTINE, you’re right. It is funny.

    I would also call it one more way to debunk the idea that narcissists are the causes of problems for empaths.

  14. 14

    What if narcissists and energy vampires/psychic vampires/emotional vampires — and whatever new kinds of “vampire” that Judith Orloff invents to further her career — really were responsible for empaths’s problems? Rather than lack of good empath skills!

    Then, surely, empaths would be in the front lines of defending people against them. But not so.

  15. 15
    Ethan says:

    Excellent series of blog posts Rose I’m learning a lot!

  16. 16

    Music to my ears, ETHAN. As you know, I’m doing my best to bring more truth into this world.

  17. 17
    Janice Hooper says:

    I don’t think I ever got into narcissist spotting. I only ever thought of one person as a “borderline narcissist” and that wasn’t because I wanted to think of them that way – it was because I was told that’s what he was, from someone reputable.

    I did continue to take a more nuanced/different view of him, though… while understanding better the gravity of his problems, and how they couldn’t be solved by me. (That was the helpful part of the ‘diagnosis’)

  18. 18
    Janice Hooper says:

    However, when I was a young teenager and going through a break-up I did convince myself that my ex was a sociopath (and maybe gay). I read online sociopath checklists and he checked a lot of the boxes.

    I sent an email to one of my friends with the whole checklist saying, “See!! He was a sociopath!”

  19. 19
    Janice Hooper says:

    Looking back I don’t think it was true at all, and the gay thing really doesn’t make sense, as my chief complaint was how interesting he found other women. (hahaha)

  20. 20

    JANICE, what a fabulously helpful contribution!

    This idea that we can become mental health experts instantly, through the power of the internet, is so vivid now in Collective Consciousness. And, of course, it’s bogus.

  21. 21

    Such a faulty premise, that we can become mental health experts if we’re smart. Plus we spend an hour on the internet. And then we find a cool checklist.

    Maybe feeling ever-so-perceptive and wise as we “evaluate” somebody we now hate or despise.

  22. 22

    JANICE and other Blog-Buddies, I see one of my chief responsibility for all my specialties — the Founder of Energy Spirituality, and an Enlightenment teacher and aura reading teacher and Empath teacher and teacher of Energy Spirituality energy healing techniques.

    As just this one simple thing.

  23. 23

    Trash the easy, cheap feelings of “empowerment” that proceed from a faulty premise.

    Instead, gain true empowerment. Learn about what’s true in reality. Then follow up with a credible, responsible system that brings results. And, along the way, appropriately use your self-authority.

  24. 24

    What you did, back in the day, is what so many other well-meaning people do. We believe in easy premises that flatter us but aren’t true.

    And then we pack in a lot of time and emotional intensity — and unearned sense of self-authority — to spiral away from what’s really helpful.

  25. 25

    At our earlier article in this 3-part series on the Narcissist Spotting Craze, you can find some related learning by ATHENA. (See Comments # 9-16.)

    ATHENA was off to a good start, warning her friend against, “calling her husband a narcissist. As [Rose had written] “gaining strength through hatred”. I told her exactly what you wrote , she is not a psychologist.”

  26. 26

    But then ATHENA’S friend claimed that he had “checked off all the boxes.” You know, as if working with some “official checklist” DID make him an instant psychotherapist.

    And then, dear ATHENA was off and running. She’s learning fast, but at the time, what did she do? Fascinating, I thought.

  27. 27

    Then to quote ATHENA’S responses in Comment #11 at that aforementioned blog post:

    “I told her to evaluate herself using the same criteria and she would find least one incident where she behaved as one.”

  28. 28

    Afterward adding, “If you look for the bad you will surely find it.”

  29. 29

    From my perspective (and with great respect that’s due to ATHENA), here’s how she responded as somebody who didn’t quite know how to follow up, given the big, influential concept now in Collective Consciousness that, supposedly, “if I can read a checklist from somebody who IS a mental health expert, that’s good enough to credential me as well.”

  30. 30

    So then, in my view, ATHENA (in OUR Comment #27) slipped into talking to her friend as though they were both colleagues, having a collegial moment.

    Psychotherapists are qualified to evaluate people’s behavior. (More pop psych lingo that has slipped into Collective Consciousness.) Hey, if we’re not therapists it’s unwise to puff ourselves up in that way.

  31. 31

    Non-psychotherapists, like me for instance, do not “evaluate.” We can discuss. Theorize. Complain. Gossip. etc.

    IMHO, we human beings can have much better lives if we non-therapists don’t appropriate unearned language that we don’t really have the right to imitate.

  32. 32

    As for our Comment #12 here, that bit of belief could come from New Age or from church.

    Who else talks that way: “You will surely”?

  33. 33

    Seems to me, those of us who seek better lives can refuse the false “empowerment” that comes from speaking language that isn’t human-type language, or convincing ourselves we can speak as if priestesses or church members or therapists… when we’re not in church. And we’re not at the New Age weekend. Or therapists!

  34. 34
    Jane says:

    This is really helping me to notice the psychology terms that have become a part of everyday language.

    I am enjoying this series, looking forward to part 3. Thank you Rose!

  35. 35
    Athena says:

    Thanks for your wisdom Rose !

  36. 36

    JANE, I’m so glad for all that you wrote. You’re so welcome!

  37. 37
  38. 38
    Living on Earth says:

    Great information and reminder here Rose!

    I found that learning to speak the correct words (huge thanks to you!!) in my daily life made a huge impact in properly using my self authority.

  39. 39
    Living on Earth says:

    Back in the day when I was bogged down with various kinds of STUFF, these popular concepts in the Collective Consciousness sure crossed my mind.

  40. 40
    Living on Earth says:

    They didn’t make complete sense but they were all over the internet. And were pretty much the only explanation available to me.

    Which is why your part 3 serious is very very important to bring light into these terms causing faulty sense of empowerment.

  41. 41
    Living on Earth says:

    More importantly though, after several sessions and with considerable less STUFF. These ideas don’t impact me any more.

    I’ve a stronger discernment and spontaneous compassion towards myself and others when something goes wrong.

  42. 42
    Living on Earth says:

    Instead of endlessly agonizing in my subjective reality analyzing everything, objective reality became my best friend.

    Paying attention to what actually happens then deciding what to say or do about it.

  43. 43
    Living on Earth says:

    Words carry tremendous power.

    So appreciate your work here in bringing forward true sense of empowerment that actually works!

  44. 44

    LIVING ON EARTH, what a magnificently helpful series of comments to help convey what I’ve been attempting to share. You put the essence in human, personal terms.

    Aren’t we quite the team! And the same goes for all you Blog-Buddies who comment here at this blog. Together we really can succeed at bringing more Age of Awakening truth into this world.

  45. 45

    On a humorous note, I’m going to give you Blog-Buddies a sorta-humorous, definitely-relevant share. From time to time, I receive hate comments for expressing my views at my personal blog.

    This morning, someone named Carol attempted to comment at a blog post I published on abortion. Warning that I will have to stand before God at the end of my life. (Something I look forward to, actually. No doubt I’ll learn a lot.)

  46. 46

    As the ultimate insult, I gather, Carol stated that “the woman who wrote the article” — which would be me — is “certifiably insane.”

  47. 47

    One of the ultimate mental health diagnoses, right? This is why I recommend we take a stand, when we can, and question people who disagree with others, and that’s not enough for them these days.

    Since it’s so much more satisfying (apparently, currently) to come down from their lofty position of superiority and call that person “a narcissist” or burn! “Certifiably insane.” Let’s call out that behavior as socially unacceptable.

  48. 48
    Angie says:

    The only thing I learned from those pseudo-tests (with checkboxes) is that some of these boxes are applicable to ourselves, so in a way “we all have it” to a certain extend, or at least that’s my understanding.

    This should spark more compassion instead of judgment.

  49. 49
    Angie says:

    Of course the world is full of flavours and there are many fascinating (or not) personalities out there.
    Is someone “toxic” ?

    Then why not move on instead of feeding so much energy to that person, this is probably where all of that hate etc comes from.

  50. 50
    Angie says:

    I know it is not easy and possibly tempting.

    The last time I met such a person, I got manipulated, used and lied to. This was deceiving and I felt cheated.

  51. 51
    Angie says:

    It was not an easy situation and a business was involved.

    So I tried as much as I could to focus on the facts to show my business partner how badly this was affecting our work, no emotional (or at least refrain to as much as possible, we knew for a fact that person was in deep personal suffering and difficult situation spite of appearances); confront with facts in a conversation the guy in question while my business partner and I were supporting each other, with honesty and especially, no labels.

  52. 52
    Angie says:

    We put that guy out in friendly terms, which turned out to be the best decision ever concerning that bloke.

    And it avoided a lot of unnecessary blame and personal victimization feelings.

  53. 53
    Angie says:

    I am thankful my partner is very down to earth when it comes to this. Usually I would have been all emotional about such a situation.

    Thank you Rose for the great insight

  54. 54

    ANGIE, you’re welcome. I appreciate your generous, down-to-earth addition to this conversation.

  55. 55

    I’d like to put on my teacher’s hat for a moment and note Comment #49. Specifically the reference to “feeding other people energy.”

    To me, this is one of those leftovers from the New Age years. Never true. But, before the Shift into the Age of Awakening, many of us discovered energy and began imagining things like “feeding energy” to people. Better not to maintain this belief. It’s just not true.

  56. 56

    As you know, ANGIE and other Blog-Buddies, I don’t know everything. But I’ve read a lot of auras, helped many people in Energy Spirituality sessions. And trained many RES Practitioners and Apprentices. We use energetic literacy, of course. Not ideas that psychics get from spirits, spreading an other-worldly perspective on human life.

    Not one of us has found evidence that this is a real thing. (Except for a real belief, and sometimes fear, left over from the New Age years.)

  57. 57
    Angie says:

    I guess feeding also means wasting personal energy instead of focusing On what matters.

    Wow, had never read that one on abortion and have to say I am glad you posted because I never saw it. And boy, do I love all that you had to say on the topic ❤️

  58. 58

    Glad you enjoyed that article, ANGIE. It may be the only post at my blog where I’ve used (and explained) the term Sperm Worshipers to describe the priorities evident in America’s so-called “Pro-Life” movement.

  59. 59
    Angie says:

    I was actually curious to get your point of view on the matter… Of course we all have our beliefs, it was more your “practitioner” side of the story, with your personal experience I was interested in, which I am very glad you shared.

  60. 60
    Angie says:

    And you are so very right, I know “Sperm worshiper” sounds very harsh, but it’s what it comes down to when you think about it.

  61. 61
    Angie says:

    As a European, I am still appalled that in some American states, you can get rapped and if pregnant, your rapist still gets a decision power over the life you carry.

  62. 62
    Angie says:

    I mean, it literally is the world upside down and goes against any common sense, and especially, against INTEGRITY and RESPECT for women who undergo such ordeals.

    (I thought we were all supposed to be equals or something)

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